South Shields

Chapter 40

- PERRIE -

So... I have spent two hours at this party, and finally I'm starting to feel a little dizzy from the alcohol. Finally I don't have to feel so damn awkward just following Alex, Johanna and Emily around all the time.

Alex drags me up one the dance floor and we start dancing to Robyn's "Dancing on my own". I remember us dancing to this song at her birthday party. The dancing and my blue dress gives me a feeling of déjà vu. Alex notices it too, because she shouts into my ear: "This feels so much like my brithday party!" I nod in response to her big smile.

Alex really is a great girl to have as a friend. She's kind and caring and at the same time fun to hang out with. It's a shame she has began to hang out with someone like Johanna. Alex and I don't connect like we used to, and I can feel us growing apart. Though, this moment of recognition makes it feel a little bit like the good old days. It feels nice.

After fifteen minutes we're both exhausted from dancing non-stop. We decide to grab something to drink and then go to the bathroom. "I really need to pee." Alex had confessed with a laughter, and I could really use a quiet, calm minute in the bathroom myself.

"I'll wait for you here." I tell Alex outside the bathroom in the hallway. I pick up my phone from my bra to check what time it is. 00.04. It's not too late yet.

"Pez?" I hear a voice from the other side of the hallway. I freeze. What is she doing here? Why is she here? She should not be here. It's Em's house, and Jade does not know Em. I know that. I don't dare to look up from my phone because I have no idea what I feel. When my eyes meet Jade's, I sould have my feelings figured out, but I don't.

Jade is the only person except Alex that I know in here, and in one way I want to smile and pretend she didn't do anything wrong. But, I'm not sure I can do that. Jade has a special place in my heart, and it really hurt when she called me out like she did over a week ago.

"Perrie?" she repeats. I can see her feet coming closer. She's wearing black Vans. "Pez?" The last call for me is a whisper, that's how close she is. I still can not look at her. My heart is racing, and the butterflies in my stomach visit me again.

The bathroom door opens up and Alex walks out with her hand in her hair. I look at her with an expression that, hopefully, tells her that we need to leave the hallway immediately.

"Perrie?" Jade repeats, and that makes Alex snap out of whatever thought she was drawn into.

"Hey?" she says and looks at Jade with focused eyes. "You're that lesbian girl, right?" she says annoyed, almost as if she's offended by Jade's presence.

"Sure, but can you excuse us for a second?" Jade answers, not affected by Alex's tone.

"Excuse you? Perrie is my girl. Get your hands off of her!" Alex steps in front of me to protect me. Then she turns around to me and asks: "Do you even know her." I shrug, because I don't want to tell her the truth, nor lie.

"Who are you anyways?" Jade asks Alex.

"Alex." she simply answers.

"Oh... Nice to meet you. I've heard a lot about you." Jade smiles.

"How? I promise you, we do not have any mutual friends. Do you even have friends?" Alex asks with a sassy tone. I'm worried about where this conversation will end. Someon will start screaming.

"Oh, my friend Perrie told me about you." Jade tells Alex, and for the first time my eyes meet Jade's. They are the same brown colour as always, comforting and beautiful.