Counting Shadows [complete]

Chapter 6

"Jane, are you alright?"

It was Thursday, four whole days after I talked with Jake in the park. I was just having coffee in the kitchen when Lee-Ann joined me. The kids were already at school and Lee-Ann was working today from home, as she often did. I still kept calling the kids kids, but in all fairness they didn't need me anymore. Sometimes I thought she kept me around as a company more than anything. She liked to have girls' chat sometimes. In all honesty, most of our chats were about boys - either mine or hers. Lee-Ann divorced some years ago and was dating now and then. Of course, with two now teenagers and a job in London it was a bit complicated.

"Yes, I am fine. Why?" I asked a bit surprised. Lee-Ann wasn't exactly the worrying caring type. After three years I have been living with her and the kids, she was more of a friend. To be fair, I don't think 12 and 14 years old need an au-pair anymore, but I understand it's handy to have an extra driver in the house, not to mention I did always make sure the kids ate well and did their homework if Lee-Ann needed to stay at work London. Not to mention Toby can be sometimes a handful, like any 14-year-old, and Lee-Ann preferred an adult to be around the house in the evenings.

"You seem a bit distracted since your date with Mike. Which reminds me, how did it go?" I knew she knew I was home at a decent hour. I was pretty sure Daisy, the 12-year-old know-it-all, told her that I told her I was planning on seeing Mike again, though I was a bit vague about when. She waited the whole weekend, not mentioning anything even as we biked around the New Forest on Saturday, not when I made that cake on Sunday, or when I did take an extra care on Monday before going to the lesson, for me to start the conversation. She tiptoed around me on Tuesday. On Wednesday she made some remarks about one her ex-boyfriend hoping it would spark a conversation that would naturally lead to me talking about what she thought was the problem - Mike. Today, she clearly ran out of patience. To be fair, it was quite an achievement in terms of Lee-Ann's patience. As someone used to organise everyone and everything, she liked her answers short and to the point.

"It was OK. Nice movie, nice food. He is sweet," I dismissed the question. I focused all my attention on sipping the coffee in my hands and planning what to do next.

"OK? Just OK? So, he is sweet and it was just OK?" She would not let it go. She reached out to the cabinet for leftover biscuits and offered me some. Not that bribes would work on me. Well, I did take a biscuit but you know what I mean.

"I guess I am just a bit busy now. You know, I would like to finish the course soon. And as I am still working at the pub..." I nibbled the biscuit.

"Which strictly speaking you don't need to..." I knew she was right. She knew she was right. Lee-Ann sighted.

"OK, I will let you off the hook," she continued when it was clear I didn't want to expand on my excuse. "I guess kudos for trying. Are you planning on seeing him again?" She poured herself another cup of coffee.

"Yes, at some point," I admitted. Strictly speaking, there was nothing wrong with Mike. Actually, he was really nice. Though I would say the same about a book.

"Then there is still some hope for you." She smiled, took her cup and then walked into her home office. She left the biscuits on the counter conveniently placed for me to finish them. The chitchat was over and it was time to work. I smiled. She was right. There was still hope for me. Once I washed the dishes, picked up the kids, done my shift and sorted my problem. Then the world was my oyster.

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