When Worlds Collide - A Zayn Malik Fanfic

59; Crooked buttons, zen, and heartbreak

Zayn

 

I can’t help it. The minute Violet and Liam leave the cafeteria, I follow them. I mean, I’m just really curious as to where they’re going. Also, I just can’t really bare the thought of them being alone.

So I spy on them as they go outside, then I follow them as they go into the boys’ dorm building. I keep back, because otherwise that’ll be totally weird, and so I’m about a minute or so behind. After lunch we’re finished for the day, which I’m fully stoked about. It’s some weird thing the school is doing for extra study time, or some bullshit. To me it’s just free time.

I reach Liam’s floor, well what I assume is Liam’s floor, and I’m just walking down the hall when a door opens to my left. Violet emerges, her clothes crinkled, her hair messy, her skin flushed and slighty sweaty, her shit buttons crooked and the top two undone, and I’ve seen girls in that sight plenty of times before to know what it means.

I halt. I stop walking completely. I absolutely freeze and so does she. We just stand there looking at each other and I forget why I’m here. Oh, that’s right, I actually have no purpose for being here at all. I wish I didn’t come, I wish for once my actual brain would work and therefore I wouldn’t be controlled by my stupid feelings. I don’t know why I’m so upset, it was bound to happen between them, right? I guess Friday night really did mean nothing.

And all at once these feelings just hit me hard, and I’m angry. Really angry. Everything I wish I could have said to Violet after Friday night, every bad thought, every insult, every yell and scream and curse, it all just comes. How could she? She’s nothing. I hate her. I hate her so much. My heart is hollow and my body is numb. I’m in too much pain to feel it anymore.

So I give this awkward, menacing laugh, running my hands through my hair as I just nod, like I knew it all along. “Well,” I say, and Violet gulps, “isn’t this a sight for all to see?” I’m not even thinking, just speaking. “Violet, everyone!” I laugh manically, holding out my arms. “It’s Violet! Lovely Violet has been fucking lovely Liam! How grand! How sweet! You know, I expected more from you, Princess. But I guess that’s my fault, huh? Falling for it all? The lies, the acts, the stupid, meaningless stories. It was all false and I, stupid old fucking me, fell for it. But really, a dorm room? Wow. I guess you were just so desperate to get it over and done with, forget about me? I hope he lasted for more than a minute, because, babe, you deserve at least two or three.”

Violet just looks at me, her mouth open in this hesitant pause, like she’s trying to speak. Shock covers her entire face and it’s so funny, because it actually looks genuine.

I point at her. “I don’t even care! You know what, I don’t even give a single damn fuck. What a freaking downgrade. Tell me, does Liam know? Huh? Does he know that the love of his life is a pathetic, cowardly, lifeless slut?”

The look in her eyes is unbearable, but it’s no match for my own. I don’t care how hurt she is, she needs to know how I feel. She’s sucking the life away from me, and she needs to know that. She doesn’t speak, doesn’t move, just looks. Looks at me with broken, painful eyes that blink quickly.

I just shake my head and turn on my heel, moving to walk off. I leave her there, leaving her there to soak in my words and believe them. I hope she believes them. I am broken inside, absolutely ruined. I turn back just once as I reach the stairs and see Liam trying to talk to her, trying to hold her and pull her away, as she just still looks at me. Eventually, she allows Liam to pull her back inside, just as I run down the stairs.