ME: Lost

Jealousy

"I wondered how long you would wait to approach me." The drell blinked calmly as he continued to gaze out the window, his voice guttural and strained.

"Have we met before?" Kaidan asked, confused by the obvious serenity encompassing the words.

"I am fulfilling one last request from an old friend. One last chance to choose my own path, my own actions."

Kaidan bit back his annoyance. He'd expected to gain the upperhand by confrontation, surprising the other patient into giving away information. The drell remained unruffled, almost mocking in his passivity. Another patient taking a suspiciously obvious interest in him over the course of several days wouldn't normally put him this much on edge - but the strained tension in the air, the fantastic accounts he'd read about his commander and their mission, as well as his continuing amnesia were all contributing to a certain level of paranoia.

The being across from him was obviously a patient at Huerta Memorial, the consistency and force of his coughs signified he was very sick, but the deliberate studied calm that pervaded his presence had an edge to it. A dangerous edge.

"I know you've been watching me. Why?"

The other patient shifted in his seat, crossing one long leg over the other before responding.

"We have a mutual acquaintance in your former commander," he tipped his head back and his cold black eyes met Kaidan's gaze, "I offered to guard you while you recovered."

Kaidan squinted, unsure how to respond to this revelation.

The drell sighed and gestured at the closest chair. "Please sit down, major, I'm too weary to continue along this conversation's obvious path. Ask, I will answer what I can."

<><><>

Thane returned his gaze to the window as his new acquaintance settled into the soft cushions of the chair. The end of his life was a fine time to show generosity to a close friend; but in this moment, with the object of his envy seated across from him, he regretted his offer of protection.

Radiant eyes soften in understanding. Bottom lip bleeds slightly where she bites it unknowingly. Nine tiny freckles decorate the graceful hand that squeezes his shoulder. "You avenged your loved one, I would have done the same."

The memory faded slowly as though anxious to remain; but the cold hospital pressed around him, drawing him back to the present, and the human staring at him expectantly.

Thane sighed in relief as he realized the memories had remained within his mind. Reciting them out loud would only end in pain and embarrassment.

"Forgive me, major, my mind wandered. This happen more frequently now. Could you please repeat your question?"

The officer's eyes tightened momentarily but he nodded graciously. "I asked how long you've known the commander."

"Commander Shepard recruited me to help her defeat the collectors, we had never met before then...."

Blood blossoms as the target falls. Soft prayers are offered up. Emerald eyes, focused yet questioning. Chaos, destruction, need, desperation. "Join me."

"...she is an admirable woman. I am honored to have fought alongside her."

Alenko nodded, shoulders slumping in defeat. "I've gathered that. I wish I had that same certainty."

Pity washed over Thane. To follow such a woman, love such a woman, and not remember - that would be a death in itself.

"He is important to you, Siha?" Realization. Sorrow. She can never be his. He is glad he never asked. Her shoulders bend with the weight they bear. "He is everything."

Thane turned to gaze out the window again. On the walkway below a portly volus waved his arms in frustration as he haggled with an asari customer.

"She spoke highly of you, major, even when you could not see eye to eye. I am truly sorry you cannot remember." He paused, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees. "I will share all I can of the time I spent with her."

<><><>

She looks tired. Dark smudges rim her eyes, giving her a haunted expression.
"Kaidan!" 
Anger and longing war within him, each demanding a different kind of self control. 
She smiles, eyes soft with relief. A single tear escapes and trails down her cheek. 
"I've missed you," she sighs. 
He doesn't intend to reach for her, but he can't help himself. 
Shepard leans forward into the embrace. 
From behind her, flat dark eyes glint at him in suspicion. "Commander," the word rattles in the strange creature's throat. 
A different voice, familiar in its dry edge, "come on, Krios, let's give them some privacy."
Garrus meets Kaidan's gaze and tips his head slightly, a brief gesture of common respect, "they're old friends." 
The drell's mouth tightens, an action just barely noticeable beneath his calm exterior.
"Very well."

Kaidan sat straight up in bed, the room spinning horribly - a side effect of his sudden movement.

That was a memory! The details were too crisp, too clear to be a dream. Talking to the drell must have triggered something.

Thane had briefly mentioned their meeting on Horizon, but he'd skipped over most of it in favor of advancing to the next stage of his narrative. Nothing he said could have created the clear details in that vision.

Kaidan leaned back, pressing both hands over his eyes as he sighed in relief. His broken mind was finally healing.