ME: Lost

Mend

The video log blinked into focus as a face appeared. Ashen skin belying too little sleep, dark circles under her eyes distracting against the pale face. She glanced down as if in thought, shaking her head slowly before grimacing and lifting her head slightly to stare into the camera.

I'm hoping you'll never see this message, but I figured I should record it just in case the worst happens. I'm giving this to EDI, she's our AI on the Normandy, she should be able to get it to you.
There's so much I need to say, that I want to say. Ten years-worth of conversations, and I'm trying to fit it all into a single message.

The face pulled closer as she drew her legs up onto the chair, propping the omni-tool clad arm onto both knees.

I'm sorry I never contacted you after I, well, became not dead. I was a mess, It-it wasn't a good time to have this conversation; but now the galaxy's gone to shit and I realize family is the only thing we have in the world. You and my crew, that's all I have left. You're why I'm still fighting.
You'd love them, especially Garrus. He's tough, like you, and he's always had my back. His dad's some turian military brass, so he grew up in that shadow; somehow it made him better, made him stronger, pushed him farther. He was so conflicted when I first met him, so frustrated and angry with the inaction he saw around him. It's amazing to see how far he's come.
Tali's like a kid sister. Funny in a sweet, dorky sort of way. You want to laugh at her naiveté but if anyone threatened her, you'd fight to the death to protect her.
Liara is, well, I think I can say she's my best friend. She's wise and bold, yet kind. It took her so long to understand humans. Baffling her with our odd sayings and strange views became a game we played on a daily basis. Of course, that was back when everything seemed so simple, when we were just chasing a crazy turian.
Joker is like the little brother I never had. Obnoxious, sarcastic, egotistical. Ridiculously loyal. He's been my one constant. The first and last by my side.
I wish you could've met Ashley, she was your kind of soldier. A fighter. Honestly, it's probably good you never met her, you'd have wished she was your daughter instead of me.
I- I'm sorry, that was uncalled for. I know why you were disappointed when I accepted the implant, when I decided to train as a biotic. Believe me, it wasn't an easy decision, but it was the one I made. After dad died, I was so lost, I...I had to move on. I had to change SOMETHING about my life instead of standing still, following the mold. I guess I never told you that. You probably thought I did it to get back at you or something, to turn my back on family tradition.
God, I shouldn't be dragging up the past like this. I guess that's what I get for rambling on.
There is one person that I'm truly sad you might not get a chance to meet. He's...special. I know, your daughter waited until she was thirty-two to have her first real boyfriend.
You of all people should know what it's like. Always moving, always looking ahead for your next orders, your next ship, your next level of command. There isn't room for anything else. You told me yourself, when you and dad would fight, that marrying a military man was the worst mistake you'd ever made. I know you were just saying that out of frustration, but it stuck. I was determined to be married to my career, and for a long time it worked. While everyone else was requesting posts near family, or trying to maintain long distance relationships, I was working my ass off for promotions. But then he came along, and made me want something different.
He wants to move back to Vancouver, to be close to his parents. I've thought a lot about not re-enlisting, about moving on if we're all still alive at the end of this. I always thought I'd be in for life, but a house and a quiet job sounds wonderful right now. Who knows, maybe we'll even start a family. I know, I know, that's a terrifying thought.
Hopefully, in a couple days, I can delete this message and hunt you down to have this conversation in person. We can finally talk about dad. I know we've ignored that topic for years, but I think it's time. You can tell me everything you've done in the last ten years, and I'll have one hell of a story to share.

Her face tightened, and she glanced down in discomfort as she searched for the right words to conclude the message.

I-
I love you, Mom.
I'll talk to you soon.