Carrie had stormed off back up to her room, anger fuming from her body. She didn't understand why her mother had brought that up. After all of these years, she had done well at keeping it to herself. The only people that knew about the disorder was her mom, dad, her manager Ann, and her best friend Ivey. Why did her mother think it was okay to tell him something as private as that?
"Care," she heard Mike's voice as he lightly knock on the door. She was too hung up in her thoughts that she didn't answer though. The tears started to stream down her cheeks. What was at first cries soon became sobs. Mike could hear her from outside in the hall and decided to go into her room anyways whether he had permission or not.
He couldn't bare to see the sight of his gorgeous girl cry. He had seen her like this every now and then, and it hurt him every time. He would do anything to bring her amazing smile back. It was what he craved to see. At first, he just held her in his arms as they lied down on the bed. He could tell that she was going through flashbacks of those dark times in her life that he had no idea of. He wanted to know so desperately so he could make her feel better, but he knew to be patient.
It took her about twenty minutes to finally calm down. Her breathing subsided and she felt herself getting tired again as she continued to lay her head on his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat as his fingers threaded through her blonde hair.
"I love you, Princess," Mike whispered soothingly into her ear as he planted a kiss on her forehead.
"I love you too," she murmured before sitting up. "Can we go for a walk?"
He nodded, "Whatever you want."
They put on shoes and jackets before going downstairs, sneaking out the back door wanting to avoid her parents as much as possible for the time being. Both loved the feeling of being outside. The sense of home was brought about Carrie as they walked through the many acres that sat in her backyard. Attached to one of the strong oak trees hung a tire swing which Carrie spent most of her childhood on. The thought of those memories made her smile. She sat down beside the tree as Mike joined her.
"So how much did she tell you?" Carrie asked, looking into his crystal blue eyes that she always got lost in.
"Mostly things I already knew," Mike sighed. "Except the eating disorder."
"Why did she bring it up?" Carrie asked, only knowing the little bit of conversation she heard.
In that moment, Mike knew it would be awful to lie to her, but he didn't want to tell her his plans he had for them. He wanted to wait until the right time. "Um...she was just asking about our relationship. I think she just wanted to know how much you told me as to how serious we are."
"I still don't understand why she bring up something like that," she said rather irritative.
"I just think she wanted mw to understand what I'm getting myself into and to make sure that I'm here for the right reasons," he told her.
"And?"
"And what?"
"What are your answers to that?" Carrie questioned, knowing but not knowing the answer at the same time.
"With dating you I know what goes with that. We're away from each other quite a bit because of our careers, but I think that's why we are so good together because we are independent people. At the same time though, that doesn't mean that I'm not committed to our relationship. If there's ever a time that distance is what is causing us to falter, I'm going to do my best to fix that and to be there more.
"Now what you're mom is concerned about is the fame. I know the type of fame that comes with being with you. I don't love it and it's not what I'm here for, but it doesn't make me love you any less either. And also with your career comes certain challenges and troubles that bring out stress and anxiety within you. That doesn't make me walk away, that only makes me want to be here for you and help you get through it."
Carrie was left speechless in that moment. She knew Mike would never leave her, most of the time that thought never crossed her mind. Sometimes though, words of affirmation helped exceedingly. She caressed his stubbled face with her hand as she brought their lips together in a loving kiss, filled with everything she had been feeling in that moment.
They sat in comfortable silence as he played with her hair, her head rested on his shoulders as they gazed out into the countryside.
"I'm sorry I never told you about my eating disorder," Carrie spoke up. "It's been like two or three years ago since and it's not something I really think about anymore."
"I understand," he told her. "Was it because of the fame?"
"Yeah," she nodded. "After Idol I had put on some weight and that's all I feel that anyone ever talked about. My so called friends, some guy I was seeing at the time, people I worked with, the worst was social media and the paparazzi. That's why I started to starve myself. The more I didn't eat, the more people were complimenting me so I thought I must have been doing something right."
"How bad did it get before you got help?"
"Not as bad as what it could have been. I had just been acting out and always concerned about my weight plus I wrote down everything I ate and I was always moody. Luckily Ann started to catch on and so did Ivey and they made me get help. I saw a doctor for about a month before I was okay again."
"It's lucky that you have someone like Ann. You hear on the news so many times where a celebrity has problems like an eating disorder, or drugs or depression and their managers just keep pushing them until it's too late for them to get help," Mike told her.
"I know, I thank God that her and Ivey got me out of that," she told him. "I'm better now though I promise."
"Good," he replied. "I don't ever want you worried about your body image because you're absolutely beautiful no matter what, and I'm not just saying that because I'm your boyfriend. You are seriously the most beautiful woman I have ever met."
"You're too good to me," she couldn't help but smile, wrapping her arms around his figure. "I don't deserve you."
"You deserve the world and more, Care," he said. "I'd give you the universe if I could but the best I can assure you is that I'll give you the happiest rest of your life that I can give."
"It's so weird to think about," she said looking up at him. "I never really look too much into the future because I always try to just enjoy the moment. But with you, all I do is dream of what the future would be like with you in it. It gives me butterflies."
"A future of my life with you, that's all I want."
