Secrets (Zayn Malik)

Chapter 45

Pic of a smiling Zayn because what's better than that adorable smile?

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"We'll go slow and high tempo." Aly smiled as she wrote the sentence down.

"Light and dark, hold me hard and mellow." I smirk as I write that down.

"Chorus?"

"So we'll piss off the neighbors." I sing, smiling. "In the place that feels the tears, the place to lose your feels."

"Reckless behavior." She writes down after I'm done, making me smile again. "A place that is so pure, so dirty and raw."

I smirk. "In the bed all day, bed all day, bed all day. Fucking and fighting on. Its our paradise and its our war zone."

She squealed, hugging me. "Its amazing!"

I chuckled. "Thanks, love."

"I really think its one of your best. When did you start it?"

"A while back but I didn't have the inspiration to finish it, ya' know?"

She cocked her head to the side, eyeing me. "Not enough sex?"

I laughed at that one. "Well, you did help me finish it." I state the obvious.

She shakes her head. "You were strong enough to start on your own."

That made me smile.

"Are you going to record it?"

I chuckled, humorlessly. "As it our management would let me?"

"Dump them."

My eyes widened. What?

"You actually think that this plan is still working? Babe, think about it. If you stick with it and go back to the band after you supposedly quit, you think you won't get the same amount of hate, if not more? At this point...you have nothing to lose. Nothing at all." She speaks, shaking her head. "Life's too short. It's too short to keep doing something that doesn't make you happy. Yes, your fans make you happy. Your friends make you happy. But is that really all that matters? You're forced to sing something you don't want to sing. Your hobby is becoming something you are beginning to hate and that is not good. Zayn, you're amazing at this." She says as she points to the lyrics we just wrote. "You've thought about others happiness for so long...but baby its time to think about yourself for a change."

As I absorb what she just said, I can't help but feel like she's right. I know I'll let a lot of people down but I've let myself down for so long that I can't handle it anymore.

And knowing that she supports me on this...that she backs me up. Fuck, its relaxing to know she'll stick with me if I go on with this.

"What are you thinking about?" She asks me, one hand on mine and the other on her stomach.

I smile at her. "I was scared that you wouldn't back me up."

"Zayn..." She breathed. "Never...and I mean never think like that again. I'll always back you up, baby."

"I...I wrote something a while back, while you were in the hospital. I actually finished it but I haven't showed anyone it."

"Can I read it?"

I nod, getting up and going to the drawer, opening it and pulling out my notebook. "Just...please tell me what you think."

"Did...Did you finish the whole thing?"