Little Deaths In Musical Beds (Brendon Urie)

Chapter Five: A Secret So The Spies Could Never Find Us Out

It had been almost a month since the notification about Brendon had blown up people's phones and their interests. Other than a few stray comments here and there things were beginning to settle down for him. Fall was in full force now as it was the end of October. Two days until Halloween and a bunch of stupid parties where girls would dress like whores and guys would drool over them. Brendon was hoping to avoid them this year.

He chewed on his pen cap as he stared down at his blank notebook paper. He had an essay due on Monday that he hadn't even started yet. He was supposed to write about whom he most admired, but he didn't have anyone like that, which is why there he was two weeks later still unable to write the paper. He tapped his pen on his paper hoping that maybe inspiration would come. It did but not in the form of his paper.

well i'm afraid that i, well i may have faked it

and i wouldn't be caught dead in this place.

He fell back on his pillow and let out a longing sigh. As much as he hated to admit it he missed Audrey. Then again, it wasn't really her at all as much as having someone. He closed his eyes trying to relax. Thoughts of Aveline flashed sporadically through his brain until it accessed then stopped on one very familiar and important memory.

"What do you mean Bren?"

"I mean I k-k-kissed him," he told her biting his bottom lip, "and-"

She waited for him to answer, and when he didn't she spoke up, "And?"

"And he's not the first."

Aveline sighed, "Bren," she smiled brushing her hand across his cheek and trying to make eye contact, "are you trying to tell me you're gay?"

Brendon's head flew up, his eyes connecting with hers, "What? No!" he answered shaking his head, "Not gay, just-"

"You like both then?" she asked trying to understand.

"Yeah, something like that."

She took his hand in hers, "I will always love you B, no matter what. I don't care if you like guys or girls or-or-"

"Or?" he smiled.

She laughed, "Everything else I was going to say was kinda fucked up," she smiled, "The point is, you're my best friend, and I love you."

Brendon, without thinking, had leaned in and kissed her. It should have been a quick peck, but it lingered a little too long, was a little too soft, had a little too much meaning behind it. Neither of them ever spoke of it again.

A knock on his door jam woke him from his nostalgic coma.

"Mom," he whined through closed eyes, "I told you I'm not hu-" he opened his eyes to see Aveline standing in his doorway, arms crossed leaning up against it. "Oh, hey Liri."

"Hey yourself," she smiled, "am I disturbing something?"

"What?" he asked not understanding, "no." Then it hit him, "No, god no," he shook his head laughing, "I'm smart enough to close and lock my door for that."

"I sure hope so," she raised a brow as she walked into the room and sat on the edge of his desk. She looked down at the floor, moving her foot around in a circular fashion, "So, I know you said you didn't want to go to any parties but," she looked up at him, her eyes pleading, "Ryan's friend Silvie is throwing one."

"And?" he asked sitting up and crossing his legs underneath him.

"And I wanna go."

"Good for you," he laughed, "have a good time."