Nora

Chapter 6: Mom to the Rescue

She stares at me and I stare back at her and I think I might be going to die of anticipation and humiliation and I had no idea that was possible. 

"Are you going to say something?" I ask.

"Look Riley you're really great..." She says and I can hear how uncomfortable she is.

"But I'm not your type right?" I say not unable to hide the sarcasm and hurt in my voice.

"Riley please don't get pissed at me. This is... look I'm not the kind of girl you should be going out with, I don't do relationships and I'm not into boyfriends or friends." She doesn't look at me.

"Well you obviously do because everyone keeps going on about that guy Dylan and you two seemed to be pretty serious."

She whips her head to look at me. "You know nothing about what happened with Dylan or who he was. You don't know half of the shit I've been through okay? My life is screwed up and I'm not perfect. I don't want you to date someone like me."

"If you don't like me just say. You don't have to blame it on 'I'm not good enough for you'. We are not in a romantic comedy this is real life. Everyone's messed up and everyone's had stuff happen to them." I start pulling on my clothes and hope my parents aren't watching from the house.

"Riley please, today was really great. Don't ruin it." She looks hurt and I hate it. 

"I've got to go okay. Bye."

I feel utterly humiliated and as I walk further up the beach more and more like a jerk. It's not her fault if she doesn't like me. It isn't a crime to not want to go out with someone. 

I slam the front door and kick my shoes off. I'm angry at her, I'm angry at me and I'm angry at the universe for making me think I actually had a chance. I'm angry at whoever lives up in the clouds for giving me cancer.

I had become an expert at not feeling things. I thought I'd be able to go through these last few months feeling nothing like I went through the first few weeks numb. But I was wrong because I'm always wrong. I met Nora and I started to feel something again and it sucks.

"Riley?" 

Great, it's my mother.

"Riley what are you doing up?"

I don't want to lie to her and I'm sick of faking. "I just had one of the best days of my life Mom. I met this girl you see a couple days ago and for some reason I was pulled to her and I am utterly fascinated and drawn to her and I wish I wasn't but I am. So over the next few days we run into each other randomly a few times and today it happens again. We go out and have fun and I felt like a normal teenager again. I forgot that in six months I'll be buried in the ground. Then I had to screw everything up by asking her out and understandbly she said no. She isn't a relationship kinda girl you see. And because I've got feelings I was hurt and ashamed and angry so we had a fight. Now not only do I have no chance in hell of dating her but I'm pretty sure she'll never even want to speak to me again. I'm just so sick of everything. I just want my life back."

I feel like crying. I want to be six again and run into my Mom's arms and cry while she strokes my hair. While I'm sure Mom would be up for it now, I don't think my ego could take it.

"What's her name darling?"

Out of all the questions she could have asked me? "Nora."

"Oh sweetie I'm so sorry, but you know you might still have a chance. Does she know about the cancer?"

"No."

"Well maybe if you told her..."

"No Mom, no." It was a mistake telling her.

"Alright but if you two do end up making up then you will have to tell her eventually."

"I know. Look I'm tired and I'm going to bed I'll see you tomorrow." I take my phone and wallet out of my pants and put them on the table. I don't want any calls tonight. 

***

I wake up at noon which is never a good time to get up. I forgot to turn the air con on so I'm hot and sticky. I take a shower but the steam just clogs my head. I'm trying to suppress my memories from last night but I can't. 

I make my way out into the kitchen and find a note. 

Darling it's Mom here. Your father and I have gone out for lunch. We'll be back by about 2. We want to take a walk on the beach as well. We thought we'd all go catch a movie when we come back so be ready. I'm sorry about what happened last night. I'm sure it will all work out though.

Love Mom xoxo

I really shouldn't have told her about Nora. I think it's more embarrassing that she knows I was rejected. 

I grab some cereal and eat it on the couch watching re-runs of Friends. My mind keeps wandering though and I can't concentrate. I need to clear my head. I'd go down to the beach but I might run into Nora and it will remind me too much of last night. I need to be distracted or my mind will implode. 

So I do something I haven't a long time. I log onto Facebook. 

I hated Facebook before I got cancer and I hated it after I got it. My Facebook experience before cancer involved logging on once a day and checking my newsfeed, responding to messages and maybe making a status. I hated it because I'd rather be doing something else but I had to because if you wanted to survive high school you had to be an active Facebook user. 

After I got cancer Facebook involved people sending me get well posts and messages and people who barely even knew me using my illness to get attention and popularity. It was sick. So I just stopped using it. 

I type in my password and my newsfeed comes up. It's pretty busy. Pretty much the same as always though. And incredibly boring. Which doesn't help with the whole distraction thing. For a second I think about searching for Nora but realize I don't know her last name. I laugh to myself. I'm infatuated with a girl who I barely know.

A message pops up. It's from the dreaded ex Lilly.

Riley I'm sorry about yesterday. I know this must be a really hard time in your life and me getting upset obviously made you upset. I'm here for you, please know that.

I close the box and log out of Facebook. 

I have an hour and a half till my parents come back. Most teenagers could find plenty to do in that time but all I can think about it how much I miss a certain girl and how badly I want to erase last night. 

I go into the kitchen to find my phone and wallet where I left them last night intending to maybe go out and find my parents. But my phone isn't where I left it. My wallet's there but not my phone. I scratch my head and look around a bit more. Eventually I break down and ring it from the home phone and find it located in the lounge room. Odd. 

Maybe Mom moved it this morning while she was cleaning or something. I check my phone and as usual I have no new messages. I grab my shoes and I'm about to head out the door when my phone rings. Expecting it to be my Mom or Dad I hit accept immediately. 

"Hello?"

"Riley?" The voice is female.

"Yeah this is Riley, who's this?"

"Nora, listen I've been thinking a lot about last night and we need to talk. Can you meet me at the beach in like ten minutes?"

"Nora please I don't want..."

She cuts me off, "Just meet me there okay? Bye." And she hangs up. 

Sorry for not updating in ages everyone. I had writers block haha. Also sorry for any lousy spelling I haven't got word at the moment so I just wrote it in the Wattpad thing haha and it has no spell check. I'm awful at editing my own stuff hence why it might not make sense in bits and the spelling will be weird in places :p anyways I hope you enjoyed it. Remember to fan and vote :D if you liked it. Thank you to everyone who reads, it means a lot :) <3