The Insiders

Chapter 2*

Chapter 2- Sharlene

The rest of the day goes by incredibly slow. I spend lunch with Peter as we always have. There, I tell him about what happened between Thomas and Mr. Rasdear during math class. Peter laughs at me and tells me that I am just over thinking it. After lunch, my day continues to pass slowly and I can not help but think about math class. I do not care what Peter says, that was not normal. As soon as the bell rings in my last class,  I sprint to my locker, grab my homework and leave the building before there's even a chance of Mr. Rasdear seeing me. As always, I make it out on time. Once I'm out the door, I turn left to go to Reina's school to walk her home at 3:20. Neither my mom nor my dad have ever picked her up after school. They do not see a problem with it. Reina does not seem to mind either, but she doesn't know any different. I know different. I remember having a family. I remember when it all fell apart. Before I know it, I am at the school and Reina is hugging me. 
"Hey you," I say as I hug her back and take her tiny bag from her. "How was your day?" As soon as I ask the question, she will not stop talking about her day. Though, a part of me finds it annoying, I am mostly happy to hear she had such a nice day after a terrible night. I am proud of her. She is strong, stronger than me even.

When we arrive home after a twenty minute walk, Reina goes straight to the kitchen to help my mom make dinner. Reina loves helping my mom in the kitchen; I do not understand, but nonetheless I find it nice. Once I put down my sister's bag in the front hall, I dreadfully walk into the kitchen. As soon as I walk in I see my mom and sister busy preparing food already. My mom is wearing black pants and a white tank top. She is smiling and happy, as if nothing happened last night. 
"Would you like to join us?" My mother asks, as if just noticing me standing in the doorway. I shake my head.  
"Sorry, too much homework." I make up the excuse and take that as the time to go upstairs to my room. Once I am up there, I end up scrolling through Tumblr for hours instead of doing homework. There is no point in doing the homework as I will just figure out the answers in class. While I scroll, I hear the odd giggle from Reina which makes me smile. I am happy one of us can laugh in this house like I used to.  After a few hours, my mom calls me down for dinner. As I realize my hunger, I dash downstairs and sit at our oak wood dinning room table. I glance at the four chairs around the table, one of which is empty. Is dad still at work? Is he coming home? My mom wakes me from my worry by putting some home made lasagne on my plate. As we eat, my mom attempts small talk with Reina and I, but it's still incredibly awkward between my mom and I after last nights event.

"So," I start a painful conversation. "where's dad?"

There's a pause before my mom speaks. I can tell she's shocked that I even asked. The answer is obvious, but I want to see what she says. The pause lasts long enough to turn the atmosphere in the room to a very tense feeling.

"I don't know. He left for work fairly early and you know your father, he'll probably work late too." My mom explains trying to sound sweet. She smiles and continues eating, avoiding the truth.

"Oh okay." I respond, with my experiment done. I was right, she would not dare say the truth. The silence sticks around for a long time. After my sister is on to her second slice of lasagne, my mom breaks the silence.

"So, how have your appointments with Mr. Rasdear been going?" She begins to glare at me while I continue eating. I know she knows that I have not been going to the appointments, but I try to play along anyway.

"They've been great. He is really helping me." I reply with a tint of sarcasm. I continue eating to try to act less suspicious.

"Oh really? Well that's not what Mr. Rasdear had to say about your 16 missed appointments." Her voice begins to rise. I continue to eat my food, but I can feel my mom's eyes still glaring at me.

"Care to comment?" She asks viciously. I don't look up, but a smirk comes to my face as does a comment. 

"Well clearly Mr. Rasdear and I have a very different outlook on these appointments-"

"Sharlene! This is serious!" My mom shouts. I look up to see her face red with anger.

"Reina you need to leave." I whisper to her not taking my eyes off of my mom. Neither my mom nor I makes a sound until we hear Reina's bedroom door shut upstairs. As soon as it does, my mom stands up in rage.

"What are you thinking missing these appointments? They are for you! They're there to help you!" My anger forces me to stand up too.

"For me? No, they're not for me! I'm fine! It's you and dad who need counselling! Because it's all because of you!" I shout back pointing my finger at her.

"No this isn't about your father and I! This is about you." She gestures at me. 

"Oh no! This is all because of you and dad!" I spit back. She doesn't say anything so I continue. "I clean up every night after dad because you're so tired from trying to calm dad down. Most nights you don't even make it back to bed. Reina comes into my room every night because you wake her up and she is scared! Scared of our own parents! Scared in our own house!"

When my mom does not say anything, I run out of the dinning room and into my bedroom. I slam the door shut, making my fury roar throughout the house. I've just crossed the line, I know it. I've never talked to mom about me cleaning up after them or anything. I was sure she knew. Who else would clean up? I throw a few punches into my pillow before I sit down on my bed in defeat. 

'I should've seen this coming.' I hear, but I don't understand how. Everyone is in another room and in this big empty house, it is impossible to hear anyone that close. Ignoring the voice, I decide staying in my bed is the safest thing for me to do. I stay in my room just sitting on my bed thinking for what feels like hours. I am about to fall asleep when I hear my phone vibrate. I sit up and look at my phone, it's a text from Peter.

'Won the game just for you. I'll call you at 9 :*' The text says. I lock my phone and look at the time, it's 8:07. I have been up here for an hour and a half. I stand up and walk to Reina's bedroom, realizing I should check on her. I knock on the door, I wait moment, but there's no answer. I let myself in and see her sitting over in the corner of her room playing on her keyboard my dad got her for her birthday. She loves the keyboard, she plays it everyday. 

"Hey," I start as I walk over and sit on her bed. She continues playing, but her flickering eyes show she heard me. "you're sounding pretty good."
"I hate it when you two fight." She blurts out as she stops playing. She looks up at me. Her face is red, puffy and covered in tears.
"I hate it too." I reply. I gesture her to come over to the bed. She runs over to me and jumps into my arms. I hold her tightly with the feeling of safety.
"I hate it so much." She sobs into my arms.
"Me too," I repeat. " I'm sorry. I shouldn't of yelled. It'll be okay though." I think about what I just said and correct myself.
"You'll be okay."
After a while, Reina falls asleep in my arms. I gently lay her down in her bed and quietly go back to my room. I call Peter and we talk until 10:30. We do this almost every night. I don't understand how we have not ran out of things to talk about. Though, I am sure that if we did, we could talk about nothing for hours. Once I hang up, I lay down and close my eyes. I fall asleep to the peaceful sound of silence. When I am asleep I dream that I am at school. I walk into Mr. Rasdear's class, but this time there's only him and I in there.
"Take a seat Ms. Frasser." He says to me. Dream me takes a seat in the single desk in front of him.
"Now let's talk about your family. Have any siblings?" 
"Yeah, I have a sister." I answer, but I don't know why. I hate talking about my sister with anyone other than Peter.
"Her name?"
"Reina"
"And how does she feel about your dad?"
"I don't really think she notices that much. The sounds scare her, but she comes into my room and she sleeps it off. She never talks about it or worries too much. I think she's just too young to understand." Dream-me responds. Mr. Rasdear gives an evil smile.
"Are you sure about that?"

I wake up and immediately sit up. My breathing is heavy and I can feel tears going down my cheeks. I wipe them away in a rush as I check to see if anyone is around. I stay awake until I convince myself it was only a dream. I get my breathing under control eventually. I look at my phone and see it's only one in the morning. I put my phone down and lay back down. I close my eyes and try to clear my mind. I'm just about to fall back asleep, but that's when the bomb goes off.