8 - Dilemma

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I cannot stop thinking about him. Every night, as I watch the stars twinkle outside the window, snug as a bug in my sleeping bag, it is everything I can do not to turn to my side and stare at him. 

In his sleep, he looks like an angel. His chest gently rising and falling, his handsome face serene. 

Do I think about him because I like him?

Or because he's the only one?

Is it so wrong if I like him because he's the only one?

Or am I just being desperate? 

It's a conundrum I face every waking second of my life right now.

Either way, I cannot stop thinking about his pretty face, or his dimples when he smiles, or the way he serves me dinner before he serves himself. He remembers my little quirks, and I'm pretty sure he understands me better than I understand myself. Yesterday he led me to the strawberries section when I said I felt like fruit. How did he know strawberries are my favorite? I didn't know it until I saw them myself. 

Goddammit. Can this boy get anymore perfect?

And then there's the other question... 

Does he like me back?

What if he doesn't?

Or, what if he only likes me back because... there's no one else?

Man, what kind of messed up world are we living in?

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