Kissing Through The Fence (Frerard)

Am I not good enough?

Trigger warning: this chapter mentions self harm n stuff so git reddy

The next morning, Gee and I woke up early to go get breakfast so we could go meet Leena. Just like she said, she was sitting at the same table she said she'd be sitting at. She greeted both of us with a huge grin.

"Hey guys! How are you?" Gee grinned as well.

"I'm doing great! And you?" I'll admit, I was a bit jealous. Leena smiled even wider.

"I'm great! Thanks for asking. So I know you guys are wondering about the plane tickets," we nodded. "How it'll happen is you guys will drive to the airport a few miles down the road. You get on your plane, and when you land, you wait at the north entrance. My brother will be waiting outside to take you wherever y'all need to go. If he asks, the password is doves. Text me where you're staying, and I'll get the car down there in a few days. That sound good to you?" We nodded again, but I was a bit suspicious.

"How do I know you won't just keep my car here?" Leena slid a small plastic clip towards me.

"Just clip it to your keys, and you can track it from your phone." I smiled. She had really thought of everything.

"Thank you so much. It's about 12, so we'll meet back here at 3:30?" Leena nodded and Gee and I took the elevator back to our room.

"So what do we do for three and a half hours?" He asked. I grabbed the grocery bags from a couple days before and showed him the hair dye. "So I'm gonna have black hair now?" He asked.

"Yep, with teal roots." His eyes went wide. "What's wro-" he squealed and started bouncing up and down.

"I love it! I'm gonna look so gay!" I chuckled.

"I'll be right back, I'm making a run to the store. You can get started on your hair while I'm gone." He giggled and ran for the bathroom. I smiled.

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When I got back to the hotel room, Gee had already cut and dyed his hair. Probably because he had done his own before.

"It's not that hard. Especially the roots." He assured me as I shuffled into the bathroom with the razor and the hair dye. I smiled to myself and laid a towel in the corner and sat on it as I switched the razor on and ran the razor over my scalp until there was just fuzz left behind. I looked over to see Gee leaning on the doorway, chuckling at my appearance.

"Hey at least I don't look like I washed my hair in kool aid."

"Nice one, peach fuzz."

We laughed and started on the dye. Just like Gee said, it wasn't that hard. Well, maybe that's just because I only had about a half an inch of hair left. After we rinsed all the dye out, it was about 3:25. We made sure we had all our things (and I made sure I had all my...toys), and we rushed downstairs. Again, Leena was right where we had been just hours before. She waved us out into the parking lot so we could get going.

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Surprisingly, everything went smoothly. We got on the plane safely. Hmmm. Today was going unusually well for us. I fell asleep about fifteen minutes into the ride, but when I woke up, Gee wasn't there. I shuffled out of the seat and down the narrow aisle to the restroom and heard faint sobs from inside. I gently pushed on the door to find that it wasn't locked, or even closed properly. He was huddled in the corner, holding up a small blade. I could tell from the pinkish red lines on his opposite arm what had happened. I knelt next to him and he only cried harder.

"Gee, what's wrong...oh please stop crying..." He looked up at me, eyes red and puffy.

"Am I not good enough?" He choked out.

"What do you mean? You're much more than good enough. You're the best thing that ever happened to me. It's just your mind playing tricks on you, I promise." The corner of his lips flitted up for a moment, the he hugged me, and I took the blade from his hand. He grabbed for it and I flushed it down the drain. He frowned and I took his left arm and kissed it up and down. I kissed every scar, old and new. He looked at me with wide eyes like I had just won him the lottery. He smiled a real smile and I hugged him tight to my chest. Words would have ruined this moment, because we both knew which ones were pounding in our heads like a jackhammer. Three words, three syllables, 8 letters that meant so much. From afar, they seemed cheesy and overused. But when you got up close, they meant so much more. It was like putting your heart in a guillotine, waiting for the one you loved to release the rope, and slice you in half. When Gee looked at me with his wide, starstruck, watery eyes, I could practically read those three words in the way he gazed up at me. It really was a beautiful moment, our hearts beating in unison.

Bump, bump, bump
I , love, you