Twenty Øne Piløts Øneshots

Chapter 18ish

Trigger warning: Suicidal thoughts/actions oh nu

It had been three months since the Blurryface account posted its final tweet, 'im a goner'. Three months since Josh had lost one of the most important people in his life. It had been three months since Tyler had killed himself.

His family had slowly been recovering, but Josh didn't. How could he, when the best thing that had ever happened to him was six feet underground?

It was probably because of you.

Josh's personal Blurryface piped up helpfully.

He would have been fine if you hadn't asked him for help all those times. He thought you were weak, and he probably wanted to get away from you.

Curling up on himself, Josh felt tears begin to roll down his cheeks. On times like this, he would usually call Tyler and beg for help or reassurance.

But of course, you can't call someone that's dead.

"Please, won't you go to someone else's head?" Josh begged. "What have I done to you?"

Wow, don't let Laura know you talk to me. She'll kill herself too.

The tears were coming faster now, he could see them on the paper in front of him.

When did I get paper?

Absentmindedly, he picked up a pencil and began to write. At first, it was random scribbles, notes from Blurry, but then it formed into a letter for Tyler.

'Hey Ty. I know you'll never read this, because you're dead, but I guess it feels appropriate. I think I'll join you soon. I know you said not to, in your letter, but you have no idea how much it hurts without you here. Don't tell Mom, okay?"

Hands shaking, he read what he had written with difficulty. The shakiness of his hands and the constant tears falling from his cheeks had made the note almost illegible.

Maybe I should tell someone what I'm going to do. Mom could help, or Jordan, or Abby.

Why would they want to help you? The last person who did killed themselves!

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Josh felt himself slipping, his resolve cracking. The relentless attack from Blurryface had gone on for hours, and every possible argument he could think of being shot down. He just wanted the grating voice to stop.

"I just want you to stop, p-please," Josh whispered, voice cracking. "Please just leave me alone."

You know there's only one way to do that.

"No, my family loves me. They wouldn't want to see me go,"

Sure they do. Just like Tyler didn't want to leave you.

"YOU SHUT UP ABOUT TYLER!"

Don't you dare yell at me. He didn't care. Nobody does.

"What about the clique? They care!" Josh cried desperately, grasping for anything to give him hope.

They cared about Tyler. Not the drummer who sits in the corner silently.

Josh was shaking more than ever now. His eyes were glazed over with tears, and then he did the thing that shoved him over the edge.

He glanced down at his lap, and saw the tattoo Tyler had done on him.

He left me. He knew what it would do to me, but he left anyway.

Pulling out a fresh sheet of paper, Josh began to write his goodbyes and apologies. He went into the bathroom, and decided to do one more thing, for drama.

Going to his Twitter app, he typed in a phrase, before pressing 'post' and downing the entire bottle of pills.

'I'm sorry he won'

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Wooooooh, that was a doozy. Sorry, Alyssa!

Leave suggestions, and please stay alive. If not for yourself, then for the people that love you. Please, don't be gone.

You're worth it.

-Rhea