Captivated by a Highlander

I need feedback (author's note)

Ok. So here's the deal.

I need some serious feedback from you all, my lovely faithful readers.

No jokes, no sarcasm, just serious constructive criticism and critique.

I'm a bit lost with this book. I know where I want to take it, I know how I want everything to play out, but I can't seem to get there. From the feedback I've been getting on some previous chapters, I've noticed that I haven't quite made some things clear.

First: Tomas' exile.

I decided to have him exiled because of the underlying Monroe family code; their morals, so to speak. Every Monroe son, at the age of 14, was given a sort of lecture from their father. "The talk." And in this, each son was firmly told NEVER to dishonor a lass by taking her virginity. Secondly, they are a pacifistic clan that does not instigate trouble unless it is put on them first. They are willing to fight, but not willing to make the first move. Kain, being the warrior he is and only 24, is not quite wise enough to understand these morals yet, so he does act out every now and again (i.e., the raid at the beginning of the novel when Chris first enters 12th century Scotland). Thirdly, because of how peace-loving they are, acts of treason are serious crimes (murder, threatening to endanger/murder, blatant betrayal, rape of a woman, etc.) that are punishable by death. Kain's father would have let Tomas be put to death if he were any ordinary villager, but because Tomas is his son, he decides to disown his second born and exile him instead.

Second: Alan and Kain's Da

I wanted to wait and save this for later, but since it's confusing a lot of people, I will make this clear. Alan and the Monroes are not directly related. Alan is a descendant of the clan, and the clan adopted a new identity when it was taken over by another family name. However, the Monroe genes are strong, and Alan did inherit a lot of her characteristics that you see in the father.

Third: Logan

Again, this is one thing I want to keep mostly private and will, so you will please have to be patient with me.

Fourth: The Book

Now here is where I need you guys. I have been getting a lot of hatred from people lately in DMs, about how my book is poorly organized, how I suck at updating, and how resemblant it is to other novels. I've been losing faith in myself and this book because of this criticism, and I need explain a few things. I suck at updating because, and I can't seem to stress this enough to people, I am an employed high school senior working on my art portfolio for college! My time gets consumed by work, homework, and art projects. If I ever have free time, I'm doing something art related or listening to he "Destiny Ghost Stories" podcasts to help me relax. What a lot of you might not know is that I have PTSD and anxiety that has been getting worse these past couple weeks. If anyone reading this was around 3 years ago, you might (or might not remember) that my older sister passed away and February, and I'm still struggling with her death. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about ending my life and joining her, and for that reason is why I am on medication. But also because of my medication that a lot of my inspiration has faded. I can't write nearly as well as I used to.

So I need your opinions. I want to finish this book. I'd love to finish this book. But I've been getting so bogged down by all of the negative comments I've been getting lately that I'm losing motivation to write it.

What do you guys think? What could I do to make this more interesting for all of us? Should I continue writing it? Should I not?

Please leave your feedback about each topic by highlighting part of it and commenting on that specific topic.

I have the honor to be your obedient servant,

E. Grant