The Distance of Love

chapter 6 : 15 years

It's now May and my birthday was coming up and needless to say this is the month things started going downhill and fast.On May 2nd my dad was out of work with a back injury two herniated discs to be exact and he would be out of work for a while.My birthday party was coming up and I did invite Matthew to it but I knew he wouldn't be able to make it because of him camping with his family.I was upset because he wasn't able to be there and then on my birthday he made a big deal out of it.What he did was he gave me a radio shout out even if I didn't get to listen to it.Also that mornig he wished me happy birthday twice and that helped at least make that day go well for me.Until I heard after school from Leah that Matt wouldn't be able to be there but I knew that already but for some reason I still felt the need to cry and I didn't know why.Then the party came and it was one of the worst parties I had ever had.

The video he sent me a day after helped though and he said in the video"Hey,Caitlin I'm doing this recording for you for whenever you're feeling down or even just in general whether it be mad,sad or most other bad emotions. I'm sorry that we can't always be together like right next to each other I really wish we could just remember that no matter where you are no matter what your doing you will always be in my heart,you will always be with me with the bracelet that I wear .And anytime I feel down I think of you,you do the same ok. Above all above all of what I said .Just remember I love you with all my heart."When I watched the video it reassured me that all the times I've felt down it could be worth it and for the next two weeks I watched the video everynight before I went to bed and it helped me go to bed happy.

School was almost over so things were winding down but with no one to talk to at the end of the day because of mine and Matthew's restricted talking I was told we could talk but only if his mother listening in and that would make me nervous.but texting was able to work for a while but I wish I could just hear his voice again it was so comforting at the end of the day to just talk about what had happened during the day and let my anger or sadness out if I had to he at this point became my human diary,my rock,my faithful companion and so much more and being without his voice was slowly killing me inside I gave in one day and called him.His mother answered the phone and holy hell was I scared I had no idea what to say I introduced myself and my voice was so shaky I was mistaken for being rude and angry but truth was I was scared as hell because it was his mother after all and I did talk to him for 7 minutes but honestly I didn't think it was enough .After I hung up the phone I cried because his mother terrified me that much and I was really embarrassed to cry but I had to.It was the only way I was going to let it out.That is when I wished he was there to confort me.

Then at school the next week I was on my way back from Spanish class and a boy named Andrew Georgia was walking behind me and he had his Jackson Atty get my attention he had it and then he said.and I quote."Andrew said he likes your butt."I was angry but I said to him just to shut him up I said "What butt I have none." I talked to Matthew after school and I told him "You're most likely going to be more mad at this then I was." and I told him what had happened and his reply was "You're right I'm mad If you did slap him I wouldn't have minded."Then I asked what would you have done if you were there and he said"I would have told him off but wouldn't have slapped him even though I would have really wanted to." And on a scale of 1 to 10 my anger was about a 5 would have been higher if he did something to it.