VIXX Oneshots

Ken: No Longer Alone

WARNING: the story below contains some angst and deals with the issue of self-harm. There's a sweet ending but if you're not the type to handle self-harm well, I advise you to skip this chapter :-) 

It happened again. The demons in my head, the bullying, the panic attacks. I've been suffering from all these for the past year. I don't understand why it's me -- why I'm the one getting picked on in school, why I'm the one who looks into a mirror every day and hate the person I see in it. For me, living was painful, wait scratch that, surviving was painful. But I still continue to go to school, continue to see those bullies and continue surviving, because of one person -- Lee Jaehwan aka Ken

He's my best friend, my neighbour, my boyfriend, and the only person whom I believe would stand up for me. Sadly, he doesn't know anything about what I go through because he studies in a different school. You see, when I was struggling with all those stuff going on in school, I turned to self-harm to make myself feel better and it did. Sure, when I first started out, it hurt a little, but somehow after doing it a few times, I started falling in love with the feeling of the razor blade slicing through my skin. The red liquid that oozes out into droplets of blood made me feel better about myself. I never knew that I was going to be addicted to it. Of course, I never dared to cut on obvious, visible areas like my wrists or arms because I knew that people would be suspicious, and worse still, the girls in my school might rub it in and call me an 'attention whore' amongst all the other stuff they called me. That's why, I cut on my thighs instead, because no one would be able to see it as long as I have a pair of pants or shorts on, right?

When Ken asked me to be his girlfriend 5 months ago, I was in total disbelief. Ken is a cheerful, bubbly boy who has been sheltered for the majority of his life. He's amazingly talented in singing, is really good at sports, and even does well academically. Oh and need I mention, he's ridiculously good-looking. Long story short, he's an all-rounder, he's perfect. God has blessed this boy with so many amazing qualities whereas, on the other hand, I'm the complete opposite of him. I'm what people would call, a 'wallflower', no one really cares whether or not I'm there. I'm not really good at anything. I'm just a 'nobody'.

I had a crush on Ken for the longest time starting from when he first became my next door neighbour 2 years ago. I still remember how our friendship started.

FLASHBACK-

I was doing my homework in my room when I heard a knock on my door. I was the only one at home so I went to check out who it was and I assumed that he was my new neighbour, seeing how my mum had earlier told me that our new neighbours were going to drop by to say hi.

I opened the door and there stood a boy with beautiful brown hair and piercing brown eyes. His face lit up when he saw me before introducing himself, "Hi, my name is Jaehwan, but everyone calls me Ken. I'll be your next door neighbour from today onwards" He said smiling brightly while extending his hand for a handshake.

I cautiously shook his hand, "I'm _____, nice to meet you"

END OF FLASHBACK-

And that was when I started liking Ken. He was always the friendliest and after getting to know him better, the person with the most amount of aegyo as well. He would do all sorts of aegyo all day every day for whatever reasons, sure it's annoying, but I love that side of him the most because he never fails to bring a smile on my face with his stupid antics.

So can you imagine how nervous I was being his girlfriend because I didn't want him to know that I'm a cutter, because who could ever love a girl with scars? I knew I couldn't hide it from him for long but I was determined to try my best, to not let him know the darker, pathetic side of me and it was going pretty well, until one day he caught me cutting myself.