Always // Josh Fanfic

20) Screwed Up?

*Chloe's POV*

I opened up the text and I didn't even get to read it because it was a whole essay in all caps he called me:

Me- Hey Ty what's wro-                                           He cut me off

Ty- HAVE YOU SEEN JOSH HE'S NOT HERE WELL OF COURSE YOU HAVENT WE'RE IN JAPAN BUT CHLOE HELP IM SO WORRIED!!

I thought to myself "Wait why didn't Josh tell Tyler?" I didn't know how to respond

Me- Ty.. Josh is on a plane to Japan now okay don't worry!

Ty- Wait but....what? Anyways I wanted to know how Kitana's doing?

Me- Awe look at you caring about fans and I don't know I'm gonna see her in a couple days

I gave Tyler her phone number cause he really wanted to help her out.

(TIME SKIP A COUPLE WEEKS LATER)

These past couple of weeks have been a living hell so my job has been making some major cutbacks and soo many people are losing their jobs. Rumor has it that the firm is being sued they are losing everything so these past couple of weeks I've been kissing up to my boss trying not to get fired.

This morning I got up super early because I woke up to a panic attack, I sat in my bed my knees pressed against my chest I just started sobbing uncontrollably and I had a hard time breathing I kept hearing a familiar voice talking

"We both know what you need, come on don't be afraid one little mark wouldn't hurt?" 

 I shook my head thinking he would leave I kept shaking and repeating "Blurry no no please go away" he wouldn't leave me alone. I looked at the drawer where my blades are, I looked at my arm

"I guess one line is okay?"

 I thought to myself. I got out of bed shaking and barely standing I opened the drawer and grabbed a blade "We met again" I whispered I was on my way to the bathroom when my phone started ringing I quickly glanced at it and I was Josh I let it ring for a while as I stood at the foot of my bed contemplating on whether or not I should do this I felt Blurry breathing on my neck behind me.

 I was paralyzed with fear but I wasn't gonna let him control me this time I turned behind me and threw the blade at the wall and screamed "GO AWAY!" I fell to the floor crying praying he'd go away.

Amber was rattling the door knob

"Chloe! Are you okay?! CHLOE OPEN THE GODAMN DOOR"

 She was yelling

I heard her call someone and then put the person on speaker I wasn't thinking clearly I was staring at the wall emotionless at this point. My phone started ringing again I just let it ring then it rang again and again and again I heard her crying outside of my door by this time I've already made the crimson lines on my arm. I felt defeated I was controlled once again I hate this feeling I feel sick and dizzy and I want it to go away! I looked at my arms and all the poison coming out I blacked out from the pain.

I woke up with a pounding headache and checked the time I still had time before work I got out of bed and glanced at my arm noticing something white I looked again and my arm was wrapped. I walked into the kitchen and collapsed on the couch I was very weak and tired Amber rushed to my side and helped me up "Your not going to work today you are calling in sick okay? We have to talk" I stood up and poured me some water "Thanks and no I can't Amber you don't understand" I haven't told her about the job situation yet.

I ran to my room got ready and left for work, I got to the firm and greeted my boss "Good morning Mr. Heffner" I said with a smile he let out a frustrated sigh and slammed papers on his desk "Goodmorning listen Chloe" he hesitated I sat down at his desk.