On My Own (A Shoey Fanfic)

Alone

Joey's POV~

I woke up the next morning with the taste of Shane still in my mouth.

I rolled over onto my back, extending my arms out around me and yawning. A quick glance at the clock revealed it was a little before noon, and beside the clock was a folded paper with my name on it. I sat up, crossing my legs and retrieving the note, reading it quickly.

My dearest Joey,

I had to run out this morning to sign some papers for Lauren. I'll be back shortly after lunch. I love you so much, and don't you ever forget that.

Your loving boyfriend,

Shane

I sighed and hugged the page to my chest, my heart filling with love. I had the be the luckiest guy in the world.

I got up and slipped on some clothes, venturing out into the kitchen to fix myself something to eat. Sawyer was sitting over by the front window, staring out the world passing by. "Hello," I smiled, opening the fridge, "would you like anything for breakfast?"

Sawyer said nothing, not even a movement to acknowledge I had spoken. It was kind of eerie. I grabbed a smoothie from the refrigerator door and closed it, walking around the island counter and clearing my throat. "I'll start again: hello, do you want something for breakfast?"

Sawyer turned halfway and cast his eyes downward. "Sorry, I... I'm not feeling too good this morning."

"Well?" I asked, jutting out one hip to the side and resting my hand on my waist. He looked up, meeting my gaze for the first time this morning. "Am I making you breakfast or not?"

"No, 'm not hungry," he twisted back to the window, resting his chin on the palm of his hand.

I furrowed my brow. It wasn't like Sawyer to be like this. Although he did have a deeper side to him,  there was something about his hunched posture, his slumped shoulders, that let on that something was bothering him. I took a sip from my smoothie and sat down on the sofa behind him. When I did speak, I kept my voice low and gentle. "Sawyer... is everything alright?"

"Yes," he curtly stated, his voice shaking a little as he spoke. "I just didn't sleep much last night."

"Oh, I'm sorry," I frowned, crossing my legs.

He put his head in his hands, silent for a moment. Then, "I could hear you guys."

A blush leapt to my cheeks and the need to apologize rose again, "I'm sorry, I-I didn't mean to be loud--"

"It's not your fault," he shook his head. "I should be happy for you, but..." When he raised his head to meet my gaze, his eyes were red. "...It just feels like everyone has found love except for me."

My eyes widened. "Oh, Sawyer, I... I didn't know you felt this way..."

"'Course you didn't," he muttered, digging the heels of his palms onto his eyes. "You've got enough on your plate as it is. I wouldn't want to bother you with my... stupid problems."

"They aren't stupid," I placed my smoothie down on the table and leaned over, wrapping my arms around his shoulder and giving a squeeze.

"Just... seeing you with Shane all the time... it hurts me..." his chest heaved with dry sobs. "I don't want to sound selfish, but that's the truth..."

"It's gonna be ok," I rubbed the side of his arm up and down, scooting closer so I could hug him properly. "I was in the same place as you a few months ago. I thought that nothing would ever turn out alright, but it did, and if it did for me, it will for you, too."