Impavid

Brother

     "Are you sure this is what you want?"

      Both of my parents were sitting across from me at the kitchen table, wide-eyed. I knew that what I was saying came as a shock, but I was sure that things had changed. In the other room, I could hear Chase packing up his bags, getting ready to head back. 

      "I'm sure," I promised, nodding firmly. 

      "I don't think we should allow this," my mom spoke softly to my dad, but I could still hear her.

      "She's sure," he argued. 

      "Carson," all of the attention was focused on me once more, "is this because of a boy?"

      "Mom." I rolled my eyes. She was right, but I wasn't going to admit it.

      "I'm serious, Carson. We all know how you feel about Luke. I don't want him to hold you back."

      "Luke isn't holding me back." I drummed my fingers across the table. "This is about me."

     "I don't believe you." I was startled by my mom's bluntness. Evidently, so was my dad, as his head snapped in her direction. "What?" she asked him, "I don't." 

     "Mom," I begged.

     "Listen." She rested her elbows on the table, leaning her weight toward me. "Honey, l know this is scary and you're homesick, but I think that this is such a good opportunity for you. I think quitting would look bad in the future. It's only a few more weeks. Are you sure you can't make it?"

      "Mom," I repeated, but I knew by the look on her face that I wasn't going to win. 

      "Carson," my dad spoke up, "I think your mom's right. If you're really unhappy, then..."

     "I can do it," I grunted. "I'll go back."

     "That's my girl." 

      Both of my parents were beaming proudly. I had been raised to never give up on anything, so I knew that I really was naive to think I was going to be able to change their minds. It had taken so much convincing to let me go in the first place; it was a daring risk to even bring up the idea. 

     I stood up, pushing my chair in. I wasn't sure if it was the sound the chair's legs made as they scraped against the tile floor or the glimpse I got of Luke playing basketball in his driveway that made me wince. I must have visibly tensed up, as my mom was staring at me when my eyes found hers again. 

     "Is everything okay?"

     "Yeah," I lied. 

     I slipped around the corner into the living room where Chase was attempting to stuff a sweatshirt into his duffle bag. 

     "Hey, you."

     He glanced up and smiled at me. 

     "Hi," he grunted as he tried to yank the zipper closed again, "I just don't understand how nothing seems to fit right the second time."

      "Let me help." I moved to kneel down beside him. "I'll push, you zip."

      As I slid my small hands beneath the zipper, attempting to calm the clothing as much as I could, he yanked the zipper across. I pulled my hands out slowly, as he zipped the rest of the way. As soon as it was closed, he fell back onto the couch, letting out a deep breath. 

     "That was hard work," he joked, patting the seat next to him, "but we make a good team."

      I only smiled at this, sliding into the emptiness beside him. 

     "What's on your mind?" He poked my side, causing me to squirm as a giggle escaped my lips. 

     "I'm just homesick." 

     "But you're at home." He poked my nose this time. 

     "You know what I mean," I whined. 

     "Next weekend, let me take you home with me."

     "Chase," I laughed. 

     "I live closer than you do. My mom can make us some good food instead of dorm foodcourt crap, and you can meet my siblings."

     "Okay," I agreed, grabbing hold of his hand as it rested on the couch beside me. "I'd like that." 

      "But," he stared at me, a serious look on his face, "you have to promise me you won't fall in love with my older brother."

      "Chase," I laughed again. 

      "You think I'm joking."

      "I do," I admitted. 

      "Three different girls." 

      "Wait, seriously?" I adjusted my position, sitting up taller. "I'm so sorry."

      "It's okay," he promised. "I like you a lot though, so you have to promise."

      "I promise." 

      I knew there was no possibility of falling in love with a third guy. I was already so crazy about two. I couldn't help but wonder, though. Three different girls were interested in Chase enough to let him bring them home to meet his family, and yet fell for his brother. Did they date? Did they hookup? What happened?

      "And now you're wondering what happened," he smirked. 

      "You know me so well."

       "Well okay. We'll start at the beginning. I was totally in love with this girl. She was beautiful, inside and out. We would trade cookies at lunch all the time. Anyway, she came over one day, and the second her eyes landed on my brother, that was that."

      "How old were you?" I narrowed my eyes, questioning his story.

      "Five." 

      "You're such an idiot," I shoved his shoulder playfully.

      "Hey," he held up his hands, defenseless, "the third one was three months ago. It still happens."

      "Oh." I blinked, feeling guilty. "I'm sorry."

      "It's okay," he promised again.

      "Well, I only like you." 

       I leaned into him, mentally trying to convince myself that this was the truth. I wanted nothing more than that.