When You Can't Sleep At Night

February 8th, 2017 || 3:19am

Long sleepless nights,
Cold and dreary.

I stare at these blank, dark walls hoping for some sort of dreamy state to do what it's meant to
And take me far far away,
For My my restless eyes to close and finally refresh.

To begin a new day.

I remember it clearly..

I was looking down from cloud nine,
Admiring the beauty all around me,
Basking in the euphoria.
Never for a moment was I ungrateful,
Never for a moment was I unhappy.

And Yet still so suddenly,
And So unwillingly,
I lost my steady balance,
And all had fallen.

I was no longer looking down,
But looking up at all the beautiful clouds that i had now become a stranger to.
And so quickly, all was Lost.

The loss of hope,
A sense of confusion,
I plead for understanding.

All left for dead from my absence of words,
My silence,
My painful,
dreadful silence.

Everything seemed so foggy,
Walking for hours
Only to come back to where you started.

Always Stuck.

You never seem to miss the sun,
When you're up in the clouds.
Being So blinded by all the fog,
Blinded by the love.
Pain is so easily forgotten.

All the lies,
Like rain on a sunny day.
Fights,
Bashful like a thunder storm.
How could they be so jaded?
Remembered as something so beautiful and bright?

The amount of effort to make yourself believe everything is okay,
That there is no flaws,
It only makes it worse when it all begins to fall apart.
You find yourself asking..
How can love be so hard to forget,
But hate so easily forgotten?
How is happiness so hard to catch,
But sadness always placed right into your hands?

It all becomes so pointless,
So tiring..

And that only brings me back to where I began.
Growing more tired,
Yet still Staring at these blank, dark walls.
Praying for my restless eyes to shut,
For this long sleepless night,
To finally just have mercy.
And let me go,
To let the clouds part,
To Bring back my forgotten sunshine,
And To finally bring happiness back in my heart ..