What About Us

chapter 10

She just sets in the chair starring at me
"What! Ray why in the hell did you not use a condom! I don't buy them for my good health "
She starts to cry
"You can't even tell Carter can you " she says wiping her eyes

I just nod .i have both of my arms around my stomach .
All I can think about is Carter and how he is on vacation having fun while I am here carrying his children in me
I rub small circles on my still flat belly thinking about Carter and I as a family. In a big house with our dark haired babies with Hazel eyes I think about there first steps ,and words and scraped knees...
My aunt notices my smile
"Ray " she says in a calm sweet voice "ray honey you can't keep it"
I look at her wrapping my arms tighter around my belly

"What no! I am keeping my babies!" I yell
"Babies." She looks at me
"Twins." She whispers
"Yes and I am keeping both of them I can't just adopt them out or abort them with out Carter what if he gets back and he wants them but they are gone .... I can't do that. No . I am keeping them."
"Sweetie I haven't told you why you don't have a mom and a dad have I ?" She said putting her hand on top of mine
"All you told me was that they couldn't take care of me so you took over" I said
"Well when my sister got pregnant she was so happy she went and told your father as soon as she found out but he didn't want kids at the time he told her to abort you or he was leaving so you mom went to have it done but on the way to the hospital she started crying and freaking out about how she wanted to keep you so I being older and having my life together said I would take you until your mom and dad decided they were ready so you grew up with me and at six months old your parents wanted you and I was all willing to give you back "
She took a long raged breath
"So they drove from California to Tennessee but all ng the way their car was hid dead on by a dumpster truck.....
They both died on the scene and never got to us they were put in the local morge until someone came to clam them when I finally found the place they were at they were already crenated " she pulls a necklace that was around her neck over her shirt and opens it it's a lock it and on and each side is a small window with a small bit of ash on each side and a 'a' on one side and a 'm' .
"This she points at the 'a' is your father author and this is your mom Meghan" she takes the necklace off and hands it to me
"I don't want you to abort your babies. But please think about this in the long run not the just the happy moments but all the sleepless nights and no days off and the bills . I love you baby bit don't make a choice you will regret" and with that she gets it p leaving me alone with nothing but the necklace with in my hand
*time skip*
I had to call a cab to get home from the hospital the driver gave me a discount after I told him what happened when I get home I see my aunt's car in the driveway I walk on the door all the lights are out and I walk up to my room and flop down on my bed and cry
Sobs rock my body as I curse loudly
What am I going to do I want my babies right now they are all I have in this world to have I can't give them up
I get out of my bed and he my laptop and pull up Google and type in 'what should a pregnant woman do '
And spend the next few hours searching the web for answers I find good advice and some not important then I look up Carter's Cruse line ID number. Right now they are in the Caribbean I also find a phone number that I can call when they are on land and they will be on land in fifteen minutes I jump out of my bed and find the phone and call the number
A man with a weird accent answers
"Hello and welcome to open water luxury cruise line how may I help you "
"Um yes I am calling about a person on the cruise #7780 it is not n the Caribbean at the moment is there any way I can get in contact with him ..."

"Um well you have to be on his contact list please tell me your name "

"I am Ray Curtis"
"Sorry you are not on the list but we can run him down and him ask him if he knows you OK . Please hold for a moment"
He puts me on hold for about five minutes then I here
"Hello?" It's Carter he sounds tired
"Carter.." I whisper
"Ray! Oh my gosh I have missed you!"
"But you have only been gone for like three days"
"I know by I have been miserable without you and that why I am getting of the boat at the Virgin islands and getting the first plane to Tennessee."
OK I had to tell him
"Um Carter there is something I need to tell you ..."

"What is it babe ?"

"Um well when you left I got depressed and..."

"Really. Ray what did I say about keeping better care of your self."

"Let me finish please. Well when I got depressed I wasn't eating or drinking or feeling right so I spent the day and most the night in the pool and when I got out I fainted and..."

"Fainted. Are you OK ?!" He said

"Well not exactly. I went to the hospital and spend almost three days there ...And they told me ...That I was .."
I took a deep breath
"Carter I am ...." Then the phone went dead
"Pregnant" I whispered after putting the phone down