My American Love

Chapter 3: Apartment

I opened the door of my studio type apartment and go straight to my refrigerator to drink some water after I dropped my purse on the counter top. Yes, I have my own apartment. I've been living here for three years.

I was 18 years old that time when I rent because this is how America works. You'll be independent. You need to be independent. I'm 20 now and living alone makes me feel completely adult. I was concerned beforehand that my life might be hard. But, as it's turned out, living alone has generally made me feel like I'm one of those adults I envisioned when I was younger, who works hard and comes home at night and enjoying the freedom and adulthood.

I become intolerant of people who add unnecessary weight to my shoulders when I have my plates full. This time, I don't have the option to jet off when sticky situations arise. I stand by obstacles, on top of adapting to the unfamiliar norms, language barriers, cultural and traffic rules. This time, I find myself justifying every single move, contemplating which battles are worth fighting for, deciding effort to be placed on the right people. I become my own critic.

I take care of myself in every way possible pay all my own bills and rent, have good car insurance, pay for all my groceries and fun. I make sure that I take care of my body too through exercise and healthy eating although not always regular or consistent sometimes the pull of the Fast foods is just too strong.

It's been days, and my routine is back. I came from the office and now I will cook for myself. I put my hair into a bun, take my cardigan off, play my Usher's song there's go my baby and started cooking. While cooking my thoughts is reminiscing, blue eyes, pointed nose, defined jaw. Ang gwapo niya talaga. I can't.

I stop reminiscing when I receive a message from George on my Facebook messenger. I opened my Facebook app and saw a post from my timeline. George was here?

"Ysabelle! You live near Elk Grove? I just saw it on my Google Maps its near Sacramento."

I smiled. After we accidentally saw each other on the plane we immediately exchange phone numbers na hindi namin nagawa nung unang beses na nagkita kami at nagkakilala sa eroplano and add each other on our social medias. When I first met her I'm struck by how ridiculously friendly she is. Parang ang tagal na namin magkaibigan kahit yun pa lang ang unang beses na nagkita kami. I've had long conversations with people I've only just met who are just genuinely interested in what life is like in other countries/how I'm finding America etc. And people tend to be very giving of themselves as well. The guy beside me on the airplane pop out in my head. Si crush! That's what I like about Americans. Very friendly and genuine.

George is video calling...

I answered her call and put my phone in front of while slicing the veggies I'll put to my nilaga. Yes, I've been living in America for three years but still eat Filipino foods on my daily, sometimes weekly. Ewan ko ba. Iba ang mga pagkain ng mga Filipino, masarap at malasa and well, because of the rice. George is around the corner and inviting me to eat and drink outside but I persuade her to drink at my place in lieu of going to the bar and restaurants. Not because I'm anti-social, but because I'm already cooking food and I don't want it to be in waste I'm so damn broke from all the extra rent I'm paying so I don't want to waste.

"Hi!" She said as I open my apartment door. "Pizza!"

"Nag abala ka pa." Sabi ko at inawang ko ang pinto, "Come in."

Pumunta kami sa kitchen counter top nilagay ko muna ang pizza sa ibabaw at pinaghanda siya ng makakain habang may kinukuha siya sa bag niya.

"Beers!"

Napatingin ako sa kanya. And there I saw her grin. Gawain. Dahil nga its illegal for under age 21 to drink and buy alcohol in liquor stores ay sa bahay na lang kami umiinom. American beer is seriously underrated. Halos lahat ng underage dito sa America ginagawa yun but George is 24 she's allowed to. We just catch up sa mga nangyari sakin dito sa America she's so upset dahil hindi niya ko natulungan nung nagsisimula pa lang ako but I told her it's okay because here I am now, in my own apartment, already have my own car, and paying my own bills. Ang mahalaga ay yung ngayon.

"You have a nice place." Sabi niya at tinignan ang buong kapaligiran ng apartment ko.

Simple lang, pag pasok ng pinto itong kusina ko agad ang makikita, I don't have a dining area, I decided not to. Hindi ko binibili pag hindi kailangan o hindi gagamitin. At my age, I'm minimalist. Mag isa lang naman ako. Ang Kitchen counter top na ang ginagamit ko as my table, I just brought red high chairs.  Yung kama ko naman walang headboard, wala ring paa, it's just two huge mattresses na magkapatong malapit sa dingding ng walk in closet ko at balcony. And isang red couch sa harapan ng flat screen TV ko.  Typical, apartment of a single person. Simple lang. Unlike, Big houses or apartments, They're so big and like..... Fancy. I know not all American houses are nice and fancy and big, but you know the ones I'm on about.

"Matagal ka ng nakatira dito?"

Tumunga ako sa bote ng beer, "Magtatatlong taon na."

"Ikaw lang mag isa?" Sabi niya at kumagat sa kinakain niya.

"Oo."

"Weh? Walang boylet?"

"Walang boylet."

"Maniwala!" She laugh.

I tried dating here in California, go out on dates occasionally. I've met every guy imaginable during an endless montage of dates ranging from casual coffee to dinners at restaurants with cloth napkins but it didn't work out. The thing is, dating and relationships or whatever, they all take a lot of time and energy. And even though I risk sounding like middle aged woman right after a divorce with her cheating husband, I have to and want to invest all that time and energy in myself instead of dating hindi naman ako napunta ng America para dun. But if you need advice, andito ako. I may not be an expert on what makes your guy tick, but I probably gathered enough guy intel during our time in the dating trenches to give you a bit of insight.

"You should go out, meet people, enjoy everything you've been given and have fun." Alam ko ang ibig niyang sabihin, "I'm not saying that if you meet a guy fell in love, just enjoy."

"I can enjoy without dating, like now, I'm enjoying myself while talking and catching up with you with our lives. I know that right now being in a serious relationship is not something that matters or actually makes sense to me and I'm perfectly fine with this."

And then the topic change, balik sa buhay buhay. What I like about George is she's like a Filipino kahit wala siyang lahing pinoy. She can speak and understand Tagalog, but bisaya she's fluent. She adapt a lot Filipino doings, but still be an American. She's free spirited, open, understanding and can be fun to converse/hang with when that's George.

I ask her why she's up her in Sacramento because she lives in San Francisco, and there she told she's looking for a house to live because living in the Bay Area is so freaking expensive she doesn't want to start settling there because it's expensive. So I grab my purse and try to find business cards. George was engage with his boyfriend now fiancé in the Philippines, in Cebu and yes, nung nagkita kami sa eroplano ay kasama niya ang fiancé niya at nasa economy class din sila pero malayo sa upuan ko. Because they're trying to save money, kaya pinaka murang ticket pauwi ang kinuha nila pagkatapos nilang ma-engage.

"Here," I gave her a business card, "Top realtors in Sacramento."

"Velasco Team?"

"I'm the team's Marketing Coordinator, and we will be happy to help you." I smiled.