It Ends with Goodbye◇Drew Dirksen (Sequel to It Starts with Hello)

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fourteen

Drew's POV

"Do you believe you have anything from the past you regret?" 

How did I get here? How did I even think this was a good idea? To go to a psychologist. A therapist is one thing but a psychologist is different. If anyone wants to argue with me on this then I don't want to. 

Maybe I should go back to where all of this day started. When I had to sign up for an appointment that turned into a walk in easily....

I wake up to the silent snore that was escaping my lips but I also believe that maybe the person next to me made me. I turn on my other side and see Levi's face. His mouth is slightly parted and his eyes are screwed shut. His hair is messed up from probably tossing and turning on the hard ground as well. Nate and Austin took the bed after Levi and I told them to take it. They argued with us about it for a while but then took it as said. 

I look at Levi for a moment or two and realize that maybe I am being creepy slightly. I notice his freckles give off such a baby face he can have. His nose scrunches up more and more and I stop smiling. 

"Levi I know you are up," I whisper only enough for him to hear. 

He rolls on his other side and states rather very loudly, "no I'm not."

"Levi," I say. I scoot a little closer to him possibly a little to close for comfort. 

He groans but reluctantly rolls back on the side which he was on. He rubs at his eyes and then opens them. Levi looks at me a little and spot the closeness between us. he scoots away, "well good morning to you too darling."

"I-I," a part of me doesn't know how to explain what I was going to say, "do you think I have changed?"

Levi sits up more and then furrows his eyebrows in confusion, "changed? What do you mean changed? Drew why would ask me something like this so early?"

I look at the small clock on Nate's bedside table and see that it's only seven. I blink my eyes more and then I shrug to him. "I don't know to be honest. I am just- " I pause and yet Levi continues to stare through me, "have I?"

Levi lets out a small chuckle," of course you have!Drew you seem not only emotionally different ever since this summer but also spiritually! You have done such a great job to show me and ...even the other guys you are a good friend-"

"But I'm not a good friend," I say to him and he obviously knows exactly where I am leading to.

"Your past is your past bro. Don't let it create such a somber weight on your mind. People don't deserve that," Levi says and then closes his eyes. He doesn't drift off to sleep but I lay on my back instead of facing him still. Although Levi is probably tired and it is early in the morning I still think he has wise words. 

I have one of my arms underneath my neck and then one hand is on top of my chest. My chest feels better ever since the conversation just a couple minutes ago. The feeling it had was more painful as I was thinking I ruin every friendship and relationship I have ever had. 

"Drew I need to ask you a question," Levi is on his back now too as if I made him wake up fully by having the conversation. 

I look at him as I turn my head ever so slightly, "what?"

"Would you ever consider seeking help? I mean for what you want and what you need. I think you would be better if you seek the psychologist and actually pray to God for more peace and happiness," I know where Levi is taking this and I squint my eyes shut.