The Letters

Chapter 18: Love

Paige's P.O.V.

For some reason Alex as me and the rest of the boys except Harry sitting in the family room with her and Harry standing in front of us.

"We have an announcement to make." Harry says and smiles at Alex sweetly.

"You two are dating." I blurt out.

"How did you know?!" Alex says and crosses her arms over her chest while pouting.

"Well. Considering his arm is around you, you two have been non stop flirting for the past week and yes I have noticed you two sneaking upstairs every chance you get." I say with a smirk.

Before she can say anything else the doorbell rings. "I'll get it." Nathan says and leaves the room. He hasn't left my side since the night at the lake. I hear the front door open but then slam shut a second later. I look my sister, confused but she just shrugs so I walk to the front door and see Nathan standing there clenching the doorknob.

"Nathan who is it?" I ask him quietly taking a step towards him.

"Someone who's about to leave." He says but doesn't turn around. I take another step closer and put my hand over his and try to open the door but he won't let me.

"Nathan open the door now." I demand but he doesn't budge. Time for method two I guess. I press both of my hands on his chest and stand on my toes to kiss him hard on the lips. I push back on his chest slightly to make him let go of the doorknob. The second he does I pull away, turn around and open the door but immediately shut the door when I see who it is.

Lucas.

Nathan looks down at me, looking pretty damn mad. I take a deep breath and open the door one more time. Nathan instantly wraps his arm around my waist protectively.

"What do you want?" I ask Lucas trying to keep my breathing calm.

"I want to talk. That's all and then I promise I'll stay away. Please?" He begs.

"I thought I told you to stay away or do you not remember from me punching you in the eye? Because I'll gladly remind you again." Nathan threatens but I'm standing in front of him and I know he wouldn't do anything with me being so close.

"Fine. We can talk but Nathan stays." I tell Lucas and step outside pulling Nathan behind me. I sit down on the porch stairs and Nathan sits down on one side of my while holding my hand and Lucas on the other side.

"Start talking." Nathan mutters but Lucas hears.

"I heard about what happened and I know it's my fault..." Lucas begins but Nathan cuts him of and says, "Damn right it was your fault."

I look over at Nathan and slightly shake my head, silently telling him to stop. He looks down, getting the message and rubs his thumb over the back of my hand lightly. I look back over at Lucas and he continues.

"I wanted you to know that I'm so sorry for everything that I did to you. I know it's been over a year now but I haven't stopped regretting it. If I could change everything I would. But Paige, I love you. I've always loved you and I didn't know how to tell you or show you because I knew you would never love me back and then that whole thing happened and well I fucked everything up. I pretended to act cool about it and not feel bad around my friends but I was dying inside. My friends took my not caring as a reason to say all those terrible things to you. I told them to stop but that only made them do it more. Then when Nathan came into the picture it tore me apart even more to see you love someone that wasn't me. I know it's selfish but I wanted you even though I would never be able to have you. But then when Nathan confronted me, I'm guessing it was right after you told him what happened, I realized that he loved you back and he was good for you. What I didn't realize was how much I had already hurt you so much that nothing could fix you, not even Nathan at that point. I don't love you anymore, not as more than a friend at least but I do miss you more than anything and I know it'll never be the same but now you know how sorry I really am. I can see you're happy now and that's all I want." Lucas says.

By now the tears are spilling out of my eyes as I bury my face into Nathan's shoulder as he moves his hand to my back and rubs it while holding me closer to him. After a few seconds of silence I lift my head up and wipe my eyes.

"I'm not going to say it's okay because it's not. I fell into a really bad depression because of you which led me to trying to kill myself. But you should know that it wasn't only you who made me this depressed. Yes it was your friends but also all the pressure I had on me built up to fast and I couldn't take it anymore. I need a way to escape the pain and it thought it would help but I realized I was just hurting everyone around me. I'm not going to forgive you, I never will but I accept your apology and I appreciate it." I say to Lucas who nods and stands up.

"I hope you stay happy, Paige. Thanks for letting me say all of that. I'll umm see you around school." He says and walks down the rest of the stairs and to his car.

I sigh deeply and rest my head back on Nathan's shoulder. "Thank you." I mumble to him.

"For what?" He asks and looks down at me.

"For not killing him and for staying calm." I say and lift my head back up to look at him.

"You're welcome, boo. Don't worry I beat the shit out of him when you were still in a coma." He says but with a slight smiling at the corner of his mouth.

I laugh and roll my eyes then kiss him lightly on the lips until I hear someone clear their throat from in front of us. I pull away and look up to see Rae standing there.

"You two really need to get a room. Wait. No. Don't you dare do that. I swear to god if his dick goes anywhere near your vagina I will chop it off!" Rae starts to rant but I just burst out laughing.

"You're a little late on that...." I mumble hoping she doesn't hear but of course she does.

"WHAT?! YOU TWO HAD SEX?! Oh my god! He's going to get you pregnant! You're not ready to be a mom! I'm not ready to be an aunt! This is terrible! I am going to chop of your dick and feed it to Rose's chickens!" Rae screams and begins to walk closer but a boy that's standing behind her pulls her back.

"Who's this, Rae?" I ask with a raised eyebrow and smirk at her, completely changing the subject but it works considering she starts blushing.

"This is Sam...my ummm....boyfriend." Rae says while looking down at her feet.

"RAE HAS A BOYFRIEND?! Did you let him kiss you yet or did you run away crying again?" I say and start laughing again. Rae snaps her head up and glares at me.

"I'm kidding, love. It's nice to meet you Sam." I say and stand up to walk over to them. I hug Rae first and then hug Sam but whisper in his ear, "If you hurt Rae or try to do anything she doesn't want to do, I'm going to kill you but make it look like an accident or have Nathan beat the shit out of you, he's very good at it; just ask Lucas, he knows very well." Then pull away and smile at him sweetly.

I skip back over to Nathan and we all go inside. The boys go back into the family room but Rae and I stay behind. "Are you actually happy, Paige? I know you acting like it but are you?" She asks me.

"I am, Rae. I promise you this isn't fake. I am actually happy. Nathan makes me so happy and I realized that all of the things that happened in the past don't matter anymore. What matters is I have my friends and family who care about me and love me, and Nathan. That's all I need. I am happy and I'm going to stay happy."

THE END!

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The book isn't officially over but this is the last real chapter until the epilogue which should be posted by the weekend or sometime over the weekend.

I just want to thank all of you who've read this and also one of my best friends Maya for always being there for me and dealing with all of my crap. I love youuu! Everyone go read her fanfic, it's absolutely amazing. It's called More Than Labels by @imagineedirection

I also want to thank my other best friend Hannah for being there for me through everything and helping me with so much. I know this past year was shitty for both of us but we did it. We made it and we're stronger and we can do it. I love youuu

I love you guys too!!!

Please let me know what you thought of this book overall!

-Emmie xx