One shots

Apocalypse 4~

{Hey, sorry I haven't updated I've been busy and I'm low key dying because I need sleep. I'm thinking of getting someone else to help me write stories and keep some form of consistency with updates. If you're interested in helping you can message me. Sorry again.~ Lex}

•Therapy~

Time skip a few days:

Baz's POV~

I still felt his warmth for a brief moment after I woke, frowning to myself as I realized my bed was just as cold as before.

(My ship went down in a sea of sound. When I woke up I had everything:)

The happiness that lingered from my dream slowly dissipated, leaving me in the cold hard reality. Back to the place of all my mistakes and regrets.

(A handful of moments I wished I could change. A tongue like a nightmare that cut like a blade.)

I tried so hard to be good. To be helpful. But all I do is fuck things up. Agatha threatened my life because I couldn't mind my own business and respect their relationship.

The only reason my love, yes, my love, knows who I am is because I was forced to console him when his girlfriend died. Which was also my fault, she went on my mission after all.

I always tried to be careful, especially now. Stay in the shadows, unnoticed, reserved, quiet. Yet I still managed to fuck it up.

(In a city of fools, I was careful and cool, but they tore my apart like a hurricane... a handful of moments I wish I could change, I got carried away.)

All I wanted to do was be with him, I do love him after all, this stupid thing on my chest won't let me forget it either. I couldn't even go near him without getting beaten, it's killing me. I'm so pathetic.

(Give me therapy. I'm a walking travesty but I'm smiling at everything.)

I'll just keep smiling, telling them I'm fine, cause no one knows what happens when night falls and the darkness comes out. I curl into myself in my bed, letting the tears flow, letting all my pain show through.

(Therapy... you were never a friend to me and you can keep all your misery.)

I should tell them what's going on. I should tell them how bad I feel, how fucked up I am, but I can't. But maybe keeping it to myself is worse. I am only human after all.

(My lungs gave out as I faced the crowd. I think that keeping this up could be dangerous. I'm flesh and bone, I'm a rolling stone and the experts say I'm delirious.)

This is stupid. I shouldn't feel like this. Just because he doesn't love me doesn't mean I have to wallow in self pity.

(Arrogant boy love yourself so no one has to.)

I just need to make peace with myself first.

(Arrogant boy cause a scene like you're supposed to. They'll fall asleep without you. You're lucky if your memory remains.)

I sit up, wiping the tears from my face. I can't do this alone, and I don't have to. Agatha is gone, I don't have to stay away from him anymore. This is a start. Hey, maybe he loves me too. I smile to myself at the thought. Lying back down with a grin on my cheeks, imagining the days we could have.

(Therapy.... I'm a walking travesty but I'm smiling at everything. Therapy.... You were never a friend to me and you can choke on your misery.)