Running Through the Dark

Chapter 34

Chapter 34

NIALL'S POINT OF VIEW

The words I heard made me so mad. I was angry to hear that this sleazy man took advantage of Anna when she was in her weakest state. Before I could stop them, the words spit out:

"I'll pay for the room,"

Anna turned around to look at me with tears in her eyes.

"Come 'ere," I whispered and she walked into my arms, nuzzling into my neck.

I led her out of the room, ignoring the man giving us protests.

We waited for the elevator to ding upon its arrival, but I felt like it was as slow as a turtle. I just wanted to get Anna away from that man as quickly as possible. The elevator finally arrived, and I steered Anna in, her head still tucked against my neck. Anna reached her hand out to push the button for her floor, but I gently took her hand before she could push it, and we just watched the doors close. With her hand still in mine, I brought her delicate hand to my lips and pressed them to her soft fingers. I pulled away, keeping her limp hand in mine. Her eyes were cast down on the ground.

She quietly muttered, her voice coarse with pain, "How much did you hear?"

"Most of it," I said trying to be as soothing as possible.

"Do you hate me?"

"Anna. I promise you I'm not mad. And I definitely don't hate you. I'm surprised you haven't realized it yet."

She looked up at me, her eyes were more gray than blue.

A slight smile tugged at her lips, "Well you should know then," Her voice got quieter, "I don't hate you either,"

I pulled her closer to me. and she mumbled, "The kids in high school were right,"

"What are you talking about?"

"They called me a slut. And I am. I slept with a man when I first ran away. The only hotel in sight was too expensive, so he said I could pay in a different form. I hated it but it still happened. I slept with Eric to get a small apartment with my only friends because I felt so alone. Niall, I'm basically a prostitute." Tears started to fall from her already bloodshot eyes.

"Hey, look at me Anna. Your not a slut and your not a prostitute. You didn't sleep with those guys, they raped you Anna. Your not a slut, your just broken,"

"Yah, your right I'm broken, Niall. I'm shattered, and alone, and theres no one to fix me. No one wants to fix me because I'm ruining myself,"

"That's not true," She looked up at me with hopeful eyes that made me feel guilty for the words that cane next, "I'm sure there's someone out there that will fix you,"

She wanted me to comfort her and tell her that I would fix her. I wanted to say that too. But I can't continue to tease myself with someone who isn't mine. I can't torture myself like this, it hurts too much, and I know I'm hurting her too.

Anna's eyes were dull again as I whispered, "You and I both know who can really fix you,"

I reached out and pushed the button for her floor, but I think I heard her whisper as if she was convincing herself: The one who broke me.

The elevator door opened into the bland hallway. Anna stepped out first and I followed, observing her sluggish, sad steps. We reached her door and she turned to look at me. I wrapped my arms around her small body.

I whispered into her hair, "I'll do the paperwork and everything for the room. Should be ready sometime tomorrow," I felt her nod and I dropped my arms and walked away. I didn't look back until I heard the door close.

***

I pulled up to our houses with Anna still on my mind. My footsteps were heavy with grief for her as I followed the stone path, ignoring the clicking cameras. The door handle was cold on my fingers as I twisted it, allowing me into the cool dining room. I could hear commotion in the family room off to the right.

"I just don't understand,"

Someone was giving as much comfort as they could, "She's just confused,"

I know exactly who they are talking about, "No, she's moved on. I don't have a chance again,"

"That's not tru--"

"Louis, it hurts, so fucking much,"

"I know," Louis comforted Harry.

I forced my feet forward, guilt pulling down in my stomach. I stepped into the room and for a few seconds, no one noticed me. Harry was in Louis' arms. His shoulders were shaking with cries and I could hear him gasping for breath through his sobs. I cleared my throat and Harry and Louis looked to me, like they were afraid I heard them talking. I didn't have to hear them to know what all of the boys are thinking, I know exactly what I'm doing and I hate it. I just don't want to hurt Anna. She's already so hurt. But if I continue like this, I'm hurting my best friend. It's hard being in my position too. I really like Anna. Louis broke the silence,

"Where were you?" his voice wasn't demanding, more like he was having a casual conversation.

I hesitated. I knew this next line was gunna sound bad, "I drove Anna home," As the words left my mouth the guilty pressure in my stomach increased; like someone set a 50 pound weight on my stomach and refused to move it. I could barely breathe.Harry was hiding his sadness by shielding his body behind louis.

"And Madelina. I drove Anna and Madelina to Anna's apartments." Their expression softened a little.

But everyone knows that me spending more time with Anna than Harry does is causing problems. But I'm stuck and I don't know what to do.

"Oh. Thanks, I guess," Harrys voice was quiet and unsure.

"Harr--"

"You know what, I'm pretty tired so," His voice hiccuped, "I'm gunna just go to bed," Before another word could leave my mouth, Harry was gone.

Louis and I were just standing there alone. I checked y phone and it was only 3:16. Louis spoke up,

"It's killing him,"

"I know," my throat hurt.

"You don't even care,"

"Yes I do. You don't understand,"

"What," He paused getting angry, "What could I possibly not understand? That your trying to get with Anna. You know Harry has never gotten over her. Its killing him to see the love of his life falling for his best friend. You don't even care that your gunna hurt them both in the end."

I opened my mouth to respond, but no words came out.

Louis shook his head in disappointment, "Simon called. Due to the birth of his kid, we have two weeks off. That's plenty of time to fix this," Louis motioned to the big house, silent with grief.

With that Louis left the room, and I let the tears come. Although my tears were cold as they dried on my cheeks, they stung in my eyes like fire. The strange contrast was almost unbearable, and my breaths rolled out in gasps and bubbles.