Wide awake

Chapter Forty Seven. Chunky Chips-Ahoy Part 1

B.P.O.V

The night of Edward's departure was probably the longest night of my life. I'd stayed up so many nights in the past, but none of them were really comparable. After ascending the stairs to the third floor, I stepped inside of the ruins of my sanctuary, and knew what had to be done. 

I began picking up the pieces and cleaning up the mess we'd made. 

As a whole, the task seemed daunting and admittedly overwhelming. So instead of focusing on the entire scene before me, I mentally separated it into sections, and commenced tackling only what was directly visible and immediately achievable. I'd just begun clearing the golden carpet when I heard soft knocks at the bedroom door. I'd been prepared for Esme's resistance to my impromptu plan, so when the door suddenly swung open, I was taken aback when it wasn't her standing on the other side.

Instead of Esme, my four friends cautiously entered the bedroom one by one, each eying the aftermath of mine and Edward's altercation with varying expressions of concern and horror. I stood in the middle of the room, still soaking wet and freezing to the bone with hands full of debris, when Jasper immediately lowered himself to the floor to begin assisting me with the task of clearing it. 

The paper in my hand crumbled under the weight of my tightly clenched fist as my gaze turned nearly murderous. I had the oddest feeling of being intruded upon in that moment-as if the destruction had been an intimate and personal production that I wanted no one else to witness-let alone touch. It made my face burn hot with humiliation and anger that mine and Edward's privacy was being somehow invaded.

But when Jasper met my gaze, his blonde hair created a veil from the others present, and his silent plea was etched deeply in the hard set of his frown and the low cast of his brow. He was helpless and suffering with concern for his friend, and… perhaps even me? I couldn't be sure exactly what he was concerned about, but I was certain of this: helplessness is an unusual feeling. It often manifests into an overwhelming need to be constructive, and I was in no mood to deny anyone of that fulfillment-least of all Jasper.

And so, with a defeated sigh, I allowed him to continue clearing papers and debris from the carpet without interference. From his side, Emmett scratched the back of his neck and expelled a loud exhale as his eyes surveyed the fallen bookcase thoughtfully. Without speaking, he carefully traveled to where it lay, and singlehandedly began lifting it back to its position against the wall. Alice moved to the books on the floor and began collecting them, offering me a sad smile from where I crouched on the balls of my toes, gathering clothing and paper.

After a few moments, I realized the sounds of activity had abruptly ceased. I shifted my gaze to the people in the room, and saw them all staring at Rosalie expectantly. She was leaning against the door frame with pursed lips when she met my gaze.

"I'd like to help, Bella, but this whole… manual labor… thing just isn't my forte." She shrugged with a simple shake of her head, stumbling over the term "manual labor." I dismissed her with the best smile I could manage while the others rolled their eyes and continued cleaning. 

We worked on the floor for what seemed like hours, clearing debris and books and clothing, and no one really spoke unless it was related to the task at hand. Jasper and Emmett began discussing how to fix the holes in the walls. I tuned them out. But when Alice started for the bed, I shot up from my crouch, rigid in alarm.

"The bed is mine." I informed her stiffly, as if I were laying claim on a community cupcake and not a portion of destruction. Her eyes widened in shock, but she retreated with a nod and instead offered to hunt down a linen closet to procure new blankets and sheets-that I could handle.