One Last Thing: A Victuuri Fic!

Leave my Love behind

Yuuri's P.O.V. [Two weeks later]

Well, we're back in St. Petersburg for the first time in a two weeks, even though we were supposed to spend only a week in Hasetsu. Everything seems fine, except the fact that I've been throwing up quite often in the morning, between 6:00 and 11:00. Viktor says its stress, lack of sleep, jet-lag, and probably from drinking so much these past few weeks.
Well, now that the season is nearly starting again, and Viktor has finally finished with my program, we're getting back into the rink again so I can start practicing early and get better before the season actually starts. As soon as I'm ready and better rested and all that, then Viktor and I are going to the rink. He took Makkachin and Scruffy out on a walk for some fresh air, and he said he was gonna be back in a little while, and that I should go and rest a little if I can. It's still only 9:30, and we just drove home from the airport after flying all night, so I still feel nauseous, I don't think I'll be sleeping any time soon, at least not without Viktor here to comfort me. 

I go unpack mine and Viktor's things and smile a little, staring at my ring. Just over four years ago I bought these for Viktor's birthday, and soon enough we got married. It's funny how things work out sometimes, and I couldn't imagine what would happen if me and Viktor ever got into a serious fight over something, or something as stupid as me having a woman's reproductive system ruining our entire relationship. I've suddenly thought of something stupid now and I find myself pacing with the anxiety of Viktor not being home. What if he's finally had enough of my idiocy and he made that excuse to leave me? What if something happened to him, like he was kidnapped or hit by a car? What if he was shot? What if he was just saying he was going out but he's having an affair and he just doesn't like our relationship anymore? 
My sudden worrying intensifies when I feel arms around me, but it subsides when I notice I know who these arms belong to.

"Viktor. . .I. . ."
"You're worrying again, aren't you? About me?"
"H-How did you know?" I can feel the sting of tears forcing their way to come out of my eyes, but I hold back as much as I can. Seeing his face helps in my attempt to calm myself down.
He smirks at me and holds my hand, his hair falling in front of his eye as he puts his chin on my head. "Yuuri, I always know when you're worried about me, because this is what happens when you do. You pace, you cry. . .You shake like a little leaf in the wind."
"I-I do not! I'm just. . . Cold."
He laughs a little and kisses my neck softly.
"I think I'd know if you were cold, because you feel warm. Unless you have a fever or something?" He suddenly looks at me worried as if he thinks that he figured out why I'm so sick and sleepy right now. I sigh and just turn around to look at him, then shake my head. 
"No, dear, I don't have a fever, I have a headache and I'm tired. I couldn't sleep cause I started overthinking things. . ."
"Of course you did. Now please, will you sleep now that I'm here, and safe?"
I shake my head, because I want to be with Viktor as much as possible right now. 
For some reason I just feel really depressed and really want him by my side. I need to snuggle every inch of him. As I think about him more, I cause myself to blush profusely and he seems to take note of this.
"And why is that? Why won't the sleepy prince sleep? Is it because of stress?"
"N-no. . " I respond quietly. He puts a hand on my cheek and brings his face real close to mine, as if he's going to kiss me.
"Then why doesn't the queen tell the king what's going on in his sweet brain? Hm?"
"I thought I was a sleepy prince?"
"Yuuri. Don't avoid my questions, what's wrong? Why won't you sleep?"
"I n-need you. . .I want you. . ."
"Yuuri, we just got home, are you sure you want to do that right now? It's so early in the morning!"
"N-not like that! I need you by my side, I want you with me. . .I can't sleep because I. . ." I hold back tears, choking on my words, the words I'm not even sure of. Like a random jumble of words are trying to flow through my mouth at the same. I forget what I'm even doing, then I start crying, and God only knows why I am this time. I'm just incredibly emotional and tired right now, if Viktor would just come to bed with me I'd sleep, then wake up and feel a lot better. 

He must understand somehow because he pulls me close and kisses my head, smiling softly. 
"You just wanna be close to me? Is that it? That's what you need from me? I know we haven't had as much alone time as I wanted to these past few weeks, but now that we're home we can do anything and everything we want again. . ." I smile a little and nod, he kisses my forehead and picks me up, going to the bed and laying me down, then sitting with me. I finally get myself together enough to ask him if he wants to watch a movie, and he smiles more and nods quickly.
"Well what movie then?" I ask him, not knowing which to watch.
He just shrugs and turns on Netflix, then snuggles up to me, searching for something to put on.

~ 

About two days later, I made the most terrifying discovery ever. I don't even know how to tell Viktor, but I have to some day, but today will not be that day. Or will it have to be?

So of course I still felt sick, even after getting plenty of rest and hoping it would go away, still, at 6:00 A.M. every morning I would get up by this sudden urge to vomit. I decided this was important so I got an appointment at mine and Viktor's doctor, just to make sure I wasn't dying or something. 
Well turns out I think I'd rather be dead then explain this to Viktor. I've already explained half of it, but I don't think Viktor is ready for what I've got for him. I drive home shakily, and when I walk in the door, Viktor is sitting on the couch with his phone in his hand, he looks like he was crying and my eyes open wide in shock.
"Viktor! Oh my God! Were you crying?"
"Yuuri! Why didn't you answer your phone?! Or leave a note! I thought something happened!"
I can't help but start to cry and now I know why, but I don't tell Viktor.
"I just. . .Started having a panic attack so I took a drive, just for some air. . .I didn't want to worry you, or wake you up. . . So I. . .Well, left. And I turned off my phone, I'm so sorry. . .Babe, you have to believe me!"
He gets up like he's mad, and he walks over to me as if he was about to yell and scream at me. Still crying though, he hugs me tightly and whispers into my ear.
"If you ever need me, you wake me up, even if I am dying from sickness. Do you hear me? I don't care, I will always put you before me, my friends, and anyone else, Okay?"

"Anyone else, besides our kids, right?"
He stares at me confused, but seems to push it off just for a moment, then he realizes what I said and he takes my hands into his. 
"Yuuri, what are you talking about?"
"N-nothing. . .Don't worry about it, okay? I never said anything!"
He holds my shoulders firmly, as if he wanted me to look up into his eyes. 
I don't. 

"Yuuri, we don't have kids. . .I mean, I know you have those parts and all, but we don't have. . . We weren't planning on them just yet, please tell me you aren't going to say something crazy before we've even planned it, Yuuri! We can't have kids before a season, and if you mean you are-- I-- I--. . ."
I can't help it now, I put my hands over my face, crying quietly. And all I can do is look into his eyes and mumble the three words that probably ruined my whole relationship. 

"I'm so sorry. . ."

And with that, Viktor's eyes widen, he turns away and heads upstairs, I run after him sobbing loudly now. He seems to be putting some clothes in a bag, I quickly wrap my arms around him from behind and beg him not to do this. . .That I need him, I can't live without him. All he does is turn around, kiss my head and give me a look like he loves me, but he needs to leave, and he can't stay. 
"Goodbye, Yuuri."
Those were the last two words said to me by him.
And it couldn't have hurt worse.

I went to bed alone for the first time in over four years, I didn't even sleep. I stared at where my husband would be and sobbed. I fell asleep only after Makkachin had cuddled up to me and I ended up getting comfortable with his warmth there, instead of Viktor's.

[A.N.: SO I SAID THESE NEXT FEW CHAPTERS WERE GONNA BE SAD AND STUFF, I DIDN'T FUCKIN' LIE. Anyway, two things: 1) It will get better, because what actually is happening is cute. 2) It's gonna get so much worse. But not as sad as this in my opinion. . .Obviously cause I know what's gonna happen, and some may react differently. . . .So maybe I should not say anything! Upcoming in the next few chapters, it will remain in Yuuri's P.O.V. because Viktor is gone (for now) and it will be a bit gross (blood warning) and kinda sad JUST TO LET YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'VE SIGNED UP FOR.]