Butterfly • Book 1/3

10

(Listen to the song above when it gets to the bolded AND italicized words.)
•••••PLEASE READ THE IMPORTANT AUTHORS NOTE AFTER THE PROLOGUE IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY.•••••

POV: Lana
2 weeks later

I find myself strumming Ben's guitar on the back porch at 3a.m. My insomnia is acting up once again, as well as my anxiety, and playing guitar was the only way to calm myself down enough to get some type of sleep.
Life in Texas has been great, I love every minute of it. I talk to Ava almost daily, she's coming out to visit in less than a month, and she's staying for a week and a half. She's been keeping me strong, and so has Ben. Living with Ben again is one of the best decisions I've ever made. I could've easily said no; I wanted to, but I didn't.
After a few minutes of mindlessly strumming, I find my voice, and sing one of my favorite songs, which conveniently happens to relate strongly with my feelings as of now.

"I fought every chance of us getting here
But somehow we always come back
Cause slamming doors was our way of making us a home
And I never thought we wanted that

Oh, so, I wanna know which way to go
Cause the things we say, and the things we don't Are like ropes
Yeah, they're keeping us tied down

And I'm trying hard to fix it
But I just can't get enough
And my heart is my worst witness
Cause it knows that I'm in love
It knows, it knows that I'm in love
It knows that I'm in love, it knows
But when we, fight our tongues tie us down like they're ropes

You were afraid of the mirrors and what they'd show
But I never cared about what happened last
Thought you'd let go, let go, so that we could get home, but you kept holding on
Now we can't seem to pass the past

Oh, so, I wanna know which way to go
Cause the things we say, and the things we don't Are like ropes
Yeah, they're keeping us tied down

And I'm trying hard to fix it
But I just can't get enough
And my heart is my worst witness
Cause it knows that I'm in love
It knows, it knows that I'm in love
It knows that I'm in love, it knows

We can't tell ourselves
That we don't need some help
Because this hurts like hell
No matter what we do
And I seem tied to you I don't wanna run
I just want me and you to be okay

And I'm trying hard to fix it
But I just can't get enough
And my heart is my worst witness
Cause it knows that I'm in love
It knows

And I'm trying hard to fix it
But I just can't get enough
And my heart is my worst witness
Cause it knows that I'm in love
It knows, it knows that I'm in love

But when we, fight our tongues tie us down like they're ropes"

I hear clapping behind me, causing me to jump, almost dropping Ben's guitar on the concrete.
"Be careful with Deborah! That's my child!"
"Deborah?! You named your guitar Deborah?! And hey!, You're the one who scared me!"
He laughs, sitting down beside me. "You're the one who's playing MY guitar on the back porch at 3a.m."
"True." I smile. "So, how long have you been watching me?"
"Right before you started singing."
I cover my face in embarrassment. "But I suuuuccckkkk!"
He wraps his arm around around me, and I instantly snuggle close to him. We stay like that for a few minutes before Ben decides to speak.
"So, was there any personal meaning behind that song?"
I look up and rapidly shake my head. Ben's eyes meet mine, and I can tell instantly that he knows I'm lying. His stare is almost intimidating. I nod my head slowly, and his intimidating stare turns into a hopeful one, his mouth curving upwards in a bright smile.
"Who was it about?"
I shake my head. "That, I can't tell you."
"Nuh-uh, you're gonna tell me."
I go to stand up, in hopes of evading the question, but due to still being in his grip, he pulls me back down. He brings his face extremely close to mine, and I can feel his breath hit my face. (Thank god his breath always smelt like a mixture of mint and coffee and not disgusting.) My heart is beating so fast, it's most likely unsafe.
"I can tell you who I love."
"Who?"
In one swift movement, his lips are on mine, and we share the most passionate kiss I swear we've ever had. I tangle my hands in his hair, and one of his hands rests on the small of my back, the other on my cheek.
"You. It's you."

(~A/N: Sorry for the shorter chapter. Song is "Ropes" by Bryan Lanning. All rights go to Bryan Lanning and whomever else owns this song, I do NOT own this song. Check out his stuff on YouTube, or his daily family vlogging channel: DailyBumps)