Dear emotions and society

Seventeen

It just doesn't feel right

Being called "His girl"

All those daydreams

Where me and you were together.

And now I'm "His girl"

It just doesn't feel right

And I know this won't end well.

So many months of crying over you.

You've seeped into my heart, God damnit.

Despite the warning label slapped on your face

I let you slip and slide your way into such a dark place.

I've never lived so dangerously

But now I'm "His girl"

And not your girl.

He's worried about me but so have you

But he cared when you didn't

But you're stuck to my heart

And all these buts

They're killing me

And nothing feels right.

Straying after you

Staying with him

And I can't help but feel like he's using me

I'm so afraid, what do I do?

What if it's genuine?

What if it's not?

I just want to crawl into your arms, drown myself in your jacket

But if I would to get near you, you'd flinch.

Which is the exact reason why I'm trying to stop

Because nothing feels right.

Straying after you

Staying with him

Please, end me.

I'm so tired of nothing feeling right