Thoughts Of My Silent Mind

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Honest truth: I'm slowly just cracking,everyone I want here,isn't. I want Shorty,my nanny,my uncle,my grandmother,my papa.. Everyone except one is buried 6 feet under. I just want to curl up,and cry until I can't anymore. I'm not someone people wanna be around.. I don't have my sister. My girlfriend said she had more fun when I left. I thought life was great. No. I fucked it up like I always do,and make hell for others. I don't want to be here anymore! Does anyone realize that? I'm freaking miserable. And I'm making others miserable as well. I don't want that! I'm a constant fuck up. Why don't people realize that? Why don't they see that and stay away so they don't get hurt? I'm sorry. For everyone that is hurt because of me. I am. And honestly,I wish I wouldn't have. I.. Just want someone to freaking hug me and tell me everything's okay. But I don't deserve that! I really,really don't deserve it. And I know that..