Dead But Not Gone

Moving Forward

Derek

"Why?" Alex asked. "Why didn't you save me?"

And to that, I couldn't give a proper answer. I tried looking away but everywhere my head went, Alex followed. Then, Hazel appeared at my feet, mouth open in an "O" shape, blood surrounding her lifeless body. I couldn't move.

Then, her eyes snapped open and she looked straight at me.

"YOU'LL PAY!" She hissed.

I woke up in a pool of sweat. I was on the ground with nothing but a dirty bed sheet preventing me from touching the bloodied grass. I looked down at my leg and saw a bloodied rag around it. I moved my injured leg a little bit and winced in pain. I managed to shift all my weight onto my uninjured leg and limped outside. It was the evening and the sun was setting.

I looked to my left and found Star and Alessandra comforting each other by a fire. Xander distanced himself from the group and John was with Lucy by a picnic table. A blonde dude was next to them, assembling a weapon of sorts. I continued limping towards the fire as Alessandra noticed me. She quickly jumped to her feet and embraced me. We shared a kiss and everybody stared at us.

"I thought you were dead." Aless said softly with her face buried into my shoulder.

"From what? A bullet through my leg?" I joked.

"You suffered from more than that." A light, masculine voice added with his back turned to me. It was blonde boy.

Blonde boy turned around and announced himself to the rest of us. "The name's Angelo. John here came to me when he found out Machton was attacking. I've always hated those guys. Who's bright idea was it to try and make peace with them?"

Xander furrowed his brows and looked away.

"I guess that answers my question." Angelo finished.

Alessandra helped me to the fire pit and we sat down. Her hands were soft as they held onto mine.

When nobody answered immediately, Angelo turned away and went back to assembling his weapon.

"Rodney's still out there." Xander finally said after a minute of silence.

"I know. We all know. But now's not the time to attack." Angelo answered.

"That bastard killed Alex, Hazel, and countless innocent survivors! He made me kill Mike..."

"He didn't make you do anything. You let your anger get the better of you." John interrupted.

"What are you trying to say?" Xander yelled at John.

"Now's not the time to argue," Star spoke up. "We need to find a place to go and rest. For now at least."

Everybody fell silent once more. Aless's grip on my hand became tighter.

"As much as I want to gut Rodney, we have to be ready. None of us are in any shape to take him and the rest of Machton on. He'll come looking for us and when the time comes, we'll strike." I dictated.

"Derek's right," Lucy followed on, "we need to wait. Rodney obviously had a huge problem with Gunther for wanting to expand so he's bound to come back and check for survivors. For now, we lay low and slowly rebuild."

Xander nodded in agreement. He pulled put an extra map from his pocket and set it on the table beside him. We all got up and surrounded the map. On it were multiple communities and points of interest circled in a bold red marker. He pulled out the marker and handed it to Angelo.

"Where are we?" Xander asked him.

Angelo circled a small spot on the map. "Here. We're in Saddle Brook park." He continued to draw a line to another spot on the map. "There's a Home Depot here. We can make shelter there if you'd like."

"Hell yes! It'd be a great place to build makeshift weapons! And we'd have a roof over our heads so thats a plus!" Star agreed enthusiastically.

"We should find another place." Xander disagreed. "Thats not a good idea. It's probably ransacked or full of Rotters. I say we go to New York instead. There, we can-"

"No. We're gonna make our way to Home Depot. Its closer and much safer than the city." Angelo cut him off. "Besides, you're not leader anymore. Gunther's gone. You may have been high on leadership there but we're gonna do things differently from now on."

Xander clenched his jaw and furrowed his brows again.

"We just met you. You're in No position to order us around."

"I saved your lives." Angelo shot back.

"Not everybody's."

"You should've kept your anger under control."

Xander finally snapped and lunged at Angelo. John held Xander back.

"Everybody calm the fuck down!" John shouted.

Xander stepped back and walked away. Alessandra got up and followed him.

"Now's not the time for this bullshit." I said aloud.

"Xander's losing it." John said to me.

"He lost two friends, along with many innocent lives."

"We've all lost a lot. But we use that pain to move forward. He's not leader material. Not at this moment."

"So who's gonna be in charge? Blonde boy over there?" I pointed at Angelo and he waved back at me.

"Not him. You." John decided.

"What the fuck? No. Nope. Nuh uh." I rejected the offer.

"Derek you're the only one who can think properly. You know what's best for us. Xander's in no position to make choices for us." Star agreed with John.

I bit my lip and looked down at my hands dried with blood. I could hear Xander arguing with Alessandra in the distance. I looked up at John and nodded my head.

"Fine." I got up. "This is temporary."

John grinned and offered me his hand for a handshake. I shook it and smiled back at him. It was time to put the past behind us. And it was also time for me to make things right.