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What's Your Deal?

***VERONICA'S POV***

The rest of that night was pretty quiet in our apartment. Scott, Rachel and I watched a couple of movies, ate dinner, and hung around until we fell asleep.
The next morning, I had things I needed to do. I knew Rachel had a class and J.D didn't, which was perfect. I could go see J.D without Rachel asking where I was off to. So, at noon after Rachel left for class, I went over to campus as well. I made my way to the boys' residence hall, walked up three flights of stairs, and knocked on J.D's door. He opened it in a t-shirt and jeans, his hair still a bit disheveled from sleep.
"I am not driving you anywhere," he said, his voice tired and raspy.
"That's not why I'm here," I assured him, stepping into his dorm room. "I need to talk to you about something."
"No," J.D argued. "I have gotten myself in enough shit over the past few days; I don't need any more."
"Jason," I begged, and he looked at me. "What happened yesterday?"
"I comforted a crying girl," he said plainly. "I'm not heartless."
"J.D, you carried her to your car-"
"Why does it matter?" he asked, cutting me off.
"Because I'm not going to just accept all this bullshit the both of you are giving me!" I snapped. "It's so obvious but you're both being stubborn. What's your deal?"
"You want to know what my deal is?" he asked me, a hint of challenge in his voice. "You want to know what my issue is?"
I put my hands on my hips and looked at him, waiting.
"I loved that girl, okay?" he admitted, anger still present in his voice. "I have tried and tried to hate her, but I can't. I can't do it. I can't care about other people the way I cared about her, okay? And that feeling really fucking sucks. Is that what you wanted to hear? Are you happy now?"
"She," I started slowly, thinking carefully about my words, "she did the same thing you would usually do to people," I said. "But you couldn't do it to her. You couldn't push her out-"
"Oh hell I could have," J.D interrupted me. "You don't think I was absolutely terrified? All of that was new to me. I didn't know what the hell I was doing or feeling. She just... I don't know."
"Big, bad, tough boy J.D was broken down by a five foot four little piece of pure sass," I chuckled. "I know it and I know you know it."
"Why does it matter?" he mumbled. "I'll get over it." He put on his trench coat and ran a hand through his hair. "I've gotten over a lot of things."
"Rachel isn't like a lot of things you've had to get over," I said, but he simply stared at me.
"Are you done?" he asked sharply, and I nodded.
"Yeah," I sighed. "Yeah I guess so. But if you ever change your mind, you know where to find her."