entry twenty-one

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if you gave me a choice
i'd choose you every time
i know i would
but these rumors fill your mind
you believe them over me
you left because of those
it saddens me how they weren't true
yet they still tore us apart
but i still fall for you every day
i was grateful for what we had
i live in the past
soon you'll lose me
i'll join the present
you'll throw your nasty remarks
but it was you who waited too long
it was you who left
it was you who quit
it was you who believed those lies
it was you
if you weren't so stubborn
you'd have me
but you'd rather claim you'll never deserve happiness
then complain about how you're lonely
i tried to help
but i'm not good enough
although i am not complaining now
for i found someone else
so goodbye my almost lover
i can finally say i tried with all my might
i stay with you as you cried all night
clearly, it wasn't what you needed
so i turn back and i left

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