Nordic 5: On Tour

Invisible Wounds

"Godmorgon, pappa, isä!" Said Peter, charging into the kitchen.

His Finnish father jumped at the volume, nearly spilling his coffee. He set it down and turned to the boy.

"Peter, you need to keep your voice down. Lukas is still sleeping upstairs."

"Uncle Lukas is here." Said Peter, lighting up. "I thought he went back to Oslo."

"He decided to stay with us for a while. But we need to keep it down so he can sleep."

"That's okay. I'm up." Said Lukas, scratching his head as he shuffled into the kitchen.

"Uncle Lukas!" Said Peter, running over to hug him.

"Morning, buddy." Said Lukas, giving him a squeeze back.

Pulling back, Peter looked up and cocked his head.

"What happened to your lip?" He said, reaching up to poke the cut he hadn't seen yesterday.

Lukas winced but otherwise maintained his deadpan expression.

"Peter, that's not polite." Said Tino, but Lukas shook his head.

"No, it's alright."

He sat down at the table with Tino, and Berwald set a plate of Kaviar smörgås in front of him. Lukas muttered his thanks, keeping his focus on the plate. It was embarrassing enough to have Tino know. He didn't know how to face Berwald yet. The Swede just nodded in acknowledgment and turned to his son.

"Let's pick out yer clothes."

Peter huffed but followed his father upstairs. Tino watched them until they were out of earshot.

"Berwald doesn't know."

Lukas looked up.

"I slept in his house and he didn't even ask why I was there?"

"He trusts me." Tino smirked, picking up his coffee.

Lukas sighed and looked down at the food he had no interest in eating.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Lukas shook his head.

"It's really not a big deal." Said Lukas, trailing off as his eyes watered. Lukas let out a shaky breath and buried his face in his hands. "I loved him... more than any other."

Tino sighed and rubbed his back. There was no consolation for this.

They heard shuffling outside and Lukas picked his head up. Berwald walked in and looked around. He opened some of the lower cabinets and checked under the table.

"Did you lose something, Ber?" Tino asked as they watched him.

"Peter's run off."

Tino snickered.

"Check his room. He hides behind the mess under his bed."

Berwald grunted and went on to look for him. Lukas observed the family with amusement.

"I'm going to head home."

Tino looked back at him quickly.

"What? Why?"

"I'm intruding on your family time." Said Lukas, getting up.

"You're not intruding." Said Tino, following him into the living room. "You're a part of this family."

"You're leaving already?" Said a voice from behind the couch and Peter's head popped up.

Lukas nodded with a soft smile. Peter crawled out and ran up to Lukas, grabbing on to his waist.

"Why can't you stay?" Peter mumbled into Lukas' abdomen.

Lukas smiled at the boy and pat his head.

"I know you love the band, but the three of you haven't had time to be just a family in months."

Peter unburied his face and a pair of bushy brows tilted up.

"Before long your dads will have to go back to work. You need to enjoy them while you have them."

Peter's head drooped and he let go of Lukas. They crossed the living room to the front door as Tino frowned.

"If you won't stay with us, at least go see Emil." Tino urged.

Lukas shrugged as he grabbed his coat but it wasn't the worst suggestion.

"Th'r yeh are." Said Berwald, spotting the owner of the sailor suit that he was carrying down the stairs. He approached but slowed as he studied the group, all of them upset but each for different reasons. He looked between the adults. "What's goin' on?"

"Tino will fill you in later, Ber." Said Lukas, throwing his coat on before moving to the door. "I have to go. Thanks for everything."

Tino hugged him, urging once again, "Go see Emil. Don't be alone."

Lukas nodded and reached for the door.

"Bye, everyone."

They waved and Lukas disappeared outside. Once alone, Peter turned to Tino.

"What happened, isä?"

Tino threw on a smile.

"Everything is alright. Nothing to worry about. Now, take your clothes and go get dressed for the day."

Berwald handed Peter the suit and Tino scooted him along.

"Okay, isä." Said Peter, heading for the stairs, not entirely convinced.

When they heard a door click shut upstairs, Tino wilted and turned to Berwald. Standing on his toes, he reached around Berwald's neck to pull him in for a kiss. Berwald slid his arms around Tino's waist, leaning in as the kiss deepened.

"What's th't fer?" Said Berwald with a slight pant as they parted.

"For always being gentle and kind to me." Said Tino, hanging his arms around his husband and resting his head on his chest.

The band did not take many breaks throughout the year, so Emil bought a cabin in Norway to save time traveling to and from Iceland. It was only a few hours from any of their homes, and Lukas knew the route well. He could do it in his sleep.

On his way, Lukas thought of when they were first starting out. Berwald had gotten the attention of a record label. To everyone's surprise, an offer was made. Four musicians jumped at it, but one dragged his heels. Still being a minor at the time, Emil could not sign any agreements without a guardian's consent. Despite being one, Lukas refused to do so.

"If you don't sign it, I'll just send it to mömmu and she will."

Unfazed, Lukas countered, "Then I will tear up my contract."

"Lukas, that's no fair!" Tino argued, "Geruman won't sign us unless we're all together."

Lukas crossed his arms. "It doesn't matter. I don't want my baby brother in this business."

Emil growled. "What the hell! How can you be so selfish?"

"Do you know what happens to teenagers in the music business, Emil? They end up poor and abused addicts before the age of thirty!" Lukas broke his placid expression and Mathias raised his hands to call for a stop.

"Hang on. We care about Emil too. What makes you think we'd let any of that happen?"

"Yeah, he's like our brother." Said Tino, "We would keep an eye on him the whole time."

Berwald nodded.

Lukas stared at them and Mathias spoke.

"You can trust me."

Lukas felt sick at the thought now.