Been About You

Chptr 1: Alone Together

    All at once, we were being rushed into a four-walled white room, with flashing lights from every corner. Capturing pictures, I'll see later on some teen site, with crude comments.

                Then a bit too soon, I along with my three friends I've grown to love over the last year, were sat in front of black microphones and cups with ice occupying it. Our manager set up a Q&A for us today at Creep Records. Of course, I was the most excitable one since it was in my hometown of Philadelphia. I haven't been back here since signing to our label. This stop was going to be the longest one we take on our promotional tour for the upcoming release of the album.

                The reason being, supposedly because: "Philly is a hot tourist attraction. Even the Pope came thru! We have to make this one special." Quoting Liandra via our ongoing group message.

Let me introduce you to our group. Reckless Infinity, it might sound corny but we've been friends since Kindergarten and we always said if we ever became and actual band...that that'd be our name. Fast forward to the present and here we are. Anything is possible with some prayer and a dream. The members include Jo-Lynn, Liandra, Nitasha, and myself. Sometimes we clash but it never really lasts because we'll go right back to cracking jokes about each other and challenging each other in lip sync battles.

Honestly, I couldn't wait for them to experience the city. Although to me, it's a lot of food here and hella tourist attractions. I got bored. Prompting my move to New York City, where I met amazing people who propelled my career to what it is today. Even the people who I wish I could unmeet, I'm grateful to have met them because they made me who I am.

"Jasmean, did you hear the young lady?" Our manager, Elizabeth, broke me from my mind babble. While my eyes met the little ones staring up at me so sweetly, "Can you repeat that for me, babe?"

   The young child looked at her mother, giving a small nod once more before repeating her question, "I, err, wanted to know if you ever thought about being a solo artist?"

                That made me grin. The miniscule child, whose name I now know is Shaila due to her mom mumbling quiet good job's to her, sat down while I made up some type of response in my head.

I gave a slight smirk before responding, "I don't think I could ever go solo. I'm fully devoted to this group, I love what we do and we couldn't do that apart."

   Heads around me were nodded and Nitasha gave me a small hand grip before letting go. She's honestly my backbone.

"Next question!" Liz shouted and a girl at least six feet tall stood and gave me a half smile that made my skin crawl. "This question is for Jasmean." Have you ever heard someone say your name and you already knew they were about to say some off the wall mess? That's how I'm feeling right now.

A microphone was handed to her and I nodded, waiting for her question.

                "What does it feel like to be the ugly member of Reckless?" she giggled and looked to her left down at a group of girls I'd assume were her friends.

I held back any curse words that were at the tip of my tongue and brought my mouth to the microphone.

"Are these your friends here?" she sent a 'mhm' before I continued my statement, "then you answered your own question, big foot."

Her face was everything I wanted to see; shock and a bit of hurt. She walked into that one, looking as if she could step on everyone around her, she stormed out. She gave me a dirty glare once again which I so easily responded to by flipping her off. Serves her right using insecurities to hurt people.

Although the faces I received as I looked down the line almost made me laugh out loud. Jo had a smug look as if she was about to say those exact words. While Nitasha and Liandra were attempting to contain their laughter and had faces the color of a cherry tomato. The least appealing one was from Elizabeth, who was giving me eyes that could kill.

The camera man was signaled to take a five-minute break while we were practically shooed off of stage.

                Not even after the door was closed to the dressing room, Liz was barking in my ear, "What the hell, Jasmean! Do you know how this is going to look for you?"

I was very well aware of the effects of my actions. I just didn't give a damn. All the time on Twitter, I'm labeled as the ugly member and maybe they're right.

When I was first thrown into the public eye, I was slammed on Twitter, TMZ, even DailyMail. With the shady comments about who's the 'heavy' chick on so and so's arm. People assuming, I wear contacts or even have had some stuff amped up because there's no way I could have a Kim Kardashian like booty on my figure. Kim Kardashian doesn't even have a Kim Kardashian booty but I digress. Coming out with all the girls in public just revved up all the same comments. It gets to a person, you know. I've had to deactivated social medias for weeks at a time. But I'm way stronger now and have matured, I realized that people are gonna talk whether I'm doing good or bad so I can't stop them.

                Call me what you want but you can't call me broke. That's my daily mantra. 

"I don't care, Elizabeth! Fuck this, fuck her, and fuck everything. I am here to make music for people, not be a princess. I am anything but fake and you want me to become someone that isn't me."

I turned on my heels, ignoring everything that was coming out of her mouth and heading to the parking lot. Tears filled my eyes and blurred my vision, making it impossible to walk straight and out of the street. As I finally reached my vehicle, my phone began to ring.
                The contact read Jo Momma, let her leave a message, my subconscious added. Which is exactly what I did, not wanting to explain what just transpired.
The voicemail message sounded and I pulled my phone out to check if there were any new trends on Twitter as of yet, only #recklessinfinitymeetandgreet #freeher2017 #awalktoremember and #growingupblack.

Pulling my makeup bag out, I fixed my face. No point in walking around looking like a clown. Then I decided to just clean all my makeup off and drive to pick up a burrito from Qdoba. I checked my reflection before starting the car, only to look up and see a boy I never thought I'd see again. Someone who made me how I am today. Who could make and break me with any word.

Keith.

I'm introducing the girls next chapter.