Waiting for a Yes [Modern!Neji x Reader]

PART 17

Math was an awkward class for Neji. When [Name] walked in, she looked like a whole new person in his eyes. Her beautiful skin tainted by Gaara's lips.

"Hey Neji," she greets, waving at him. Even the way she said his name sounded off to him. It sounded more solid, like a rock hitting his chest; whereas, the way she said Gaara felt light, like a soft breeze grazing against his cheek. He hated it.

"Hi [Name]," he says, her name becoming too hard to say. "How's it going?"

"Oh," she sighs out dreamily. "Life's been great."

Of course it is. He thought. You've been giving all your love to a guy that doesn't even deserve it!

He wanted to scream that at her, he wanted her to know how much he cared for her, loved her. But the pain of rejection weighed heavily on Neji. He couldn't say anything but, "That's great."

When [Name] asked the same question, Neji hesitated. He couldn't say that he was fine because it would be a lie. Instead the boy said, "Life's been hard."

That was all he could say before the bell rang loudly. She wanted to know more, wanted to prod him into talking with her, but knew it wasn't the best time to do so.

Math class has begun, but [Name] couldn't focus on anything expect what Neji had told her. Not only has his day been shitty but life itself is shitty for him. She wondered why he felt this way, and questioned how she could make his life at least a little easier.

When the warm up was passed around by the teacher, she leaned forward and said, "Why's life so hard?"

Slightly shocked, Neji looks up from the half sheet of paper and turns his head to look at her.

Something has definitely changed in [Name]. She's never pried in Neji's personal life, even when he was clearly physically hurt. What has caused her to make this sudden change?

Please tell me it's not because she's in love with that red head. Neji thought, mentally groaning.

He looks back down at his work, sighing softly. She just didn't understand.

"I can't tell you," he mumbles.

"Why not?" She asked, tilting her head in that cute way Neji loved so much. His heart fluttered in his chest, and his cheeks became flushed.

"It's personal," he replied quickly, trying his hardest to dismiss the subject but [Name] continued to pester him.

"I promise I won't tell anybody," she reassured him.

You're a sweet little angel [Name], but you're making this hard on me. Neji thought, rubbing his forehead with his palm.

"Do you really want to know?" He asked, and she nodded her head. He contemplated this for a moment, thinking perhaps he'd lie to her but also tell a little truth too. "Fine, I'll tell you."

The ends of [Name's] lips pulled upwards into the most breath taking smile Neji has ever seen. He could feel the pace of his heart quicken, and his breath hitch in his throat.

"I'll see you at lunch, okay?" She said.

Neji could only nod his head, for if he spoke, he would've sounded like a lovesick coyote trying to serenade the moon into coming out of the night sky.

He wished he could control his feelings more often, but [Name] had this strange influence on the poor, lovelorn boy.

How could you do this to me?

...

Found in the quietest corner of the library, [Name] walked up to Neji who looked exhausted, but not physically fatigued — he looked emotionally tired, and mentally worn out.

He gave a slight wave and a half smile. She smiled back, hoping to help Neji in anyway he needed. She leaned in to touch his shoulder which sent shivers up and down his arm and caused his bicep to twitch.

"So, what's wrong?" She asked directly.

Words lodged into his throat. He wanted to be honest, he wanted to tell her the truth but the words wouldn't go farther than his lips.

Say something idiot! She's staring! He mentally yelled at himself. Panic swarmed his body, and he could feel the rejection coming on if he told her the absolute truth. This frightened him to no ends, and he could feel the flight or fight response blaring in his head. His mind told him to run away and hide but his body was frozen in place.

Neji could either speak, or run like a coward. So he choose the best option for him.

"I'm in love!" He blurted out rather loudly. [Name's] eyes widen a fraction. She couldn't believe the Neji Hyuga was in love. She honestly thought he had no interest in people.

Neji continued since [Name] didn't speak. "I know she doesn't have any interest in me cause she likes someone else. And I really want to tell her I like her, but I know she'd reject me. Maybe I should just give up."

She gasped lightly. Now that she had a taste of what love is, [Name] believed no one should give up on something so important as love.

"No no, don't give up," she says grabbing both of his shoulders. This is possibly the most contact Neji had ever received from [Name] in the four years he known her. "Keep pursuing her, and she'll notice you at some point, right?"

There was a hint of uncertainty in her voice that Neji picked up on. This was clearly her first time giving love advice to a person, in fact this was her first time ever being in love. Neji sighed, pushing her hands off of his shoulders and hanging his head.

"I've been in love with this girl for four years and she never gave me a second glance. She'll never love me," Neji grumbled, shuffling his way past her. "So what's the point?"

"Neji?" She calls out to him, following him to the exit. She reached out to him, her fingers brushing against bicep. He smacked her arm away, the look of hurt and anguish written on his features as he faced her.

You'll never love me [Name], you won't understand the pain I go through everyday when I see you with another guy. He thought as he looked at her shocked expression. His eyes began to sting, and he could feel the tears ready to cascade down his cheeks. Quickly, he turned around so she wouldn't see his face.

"I just need to be alone, okay?" He said, making a hasty escape down the hall.

"Neji!" She called for him as she saw him run down the stairs at the end of the long hallway.

A new feeling clutched at [Name's] new found heart and this feeling was hurt. The pain squeezed at the beating organ, making her pulse abnormal. This sensation cause great agony to seep into her skin, her mood sinking into a black hole and was gobbled up by the negativity that gnawed at her brain.

She wished she had her glass jar heart back, so she could shove the feelings right in and close the lid shut — never having to see it anymore. She wished she never had to feel this way ever again, but she knew that this new feeling — hurt — would come back.

...

A/N: I really really wanted to update, so I did. I hope this was good, cause I'm here to please. Thank you for reading, love you bye bye!!