you look happier
than usual, these days.
it should make me feel happy too,
well, isn't it?
but, love, I don't
feel even
a sliver of satisfaction.
i wonder why.
probably, because,
the reason isn't me
but she.
you walk her to economics
and mathematics and also,
to the rest of her classes, while
i watch helplessly, trying hard to
just shove away my feelings for you,
that still keep intensifying with
the growing days.
i have never,
ever
felt so helpless and pained, in my life.
all, at the same time.
and it keeps on getting worse, T.
sometimes, I wonder what
would you do, if you ever knew
how much i care.
would you care too?
i guess not.
i've seen that glow in your orbs, when
you look at her.
i've seen that smile, on your face, when
you see her smile.
and i've also heard how
you friends now call her
'your girl'
and how happy
that makes you.
i've read many novels,
watched many movies.
isn't that how, love should always be?
unconditional and selfless?
so, shouldn't i be happy, seeing you so,
even though, it's nina you have as yours
and not me?
i know, i sound so stupid now,
but i'm also, such a wreck, T.
you have blurred my mind, so thickly that
i can't comprehend my surroundings well enough
to tear out of your hold,
on my mind,
and heart
and also, my very existence.
you're all i see.
but, T
i think, i should also apologize to you.
for, i can never be happy,
for your happiness
even though that's what they defined
true love as.
i can never be happy enough
for your happiness, my dear,
never enough, until the reason's me.
they say, i've heard.
true love is selfless,
i wonder what they even know, about love.
YOU ARE READING
y o u
Poetryi've never breathed more, as i have around you, but breathing in the same air as you, was suffocating enough to make me want to stop. but, love, you can't just stop breathing like that, can you? [in which, she writes letters to him, letters tha...
