The Marine's Angel~

Chapter 13:

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I got home, logged on to Whittychat and undressed as I waited for Damon to come online.

While I waited, I went on Damon's profile page to write on his page. As I scrolled down, Nicole's name appeared and she wrote him a 'Hi' with a wink emoji. I scoffed and rolled my eyes.

She's one loyal bitch, isn't she? How much sarcasm can you detect?

I came here to write on his page, not obsess, over his ex girlfriend, I thought to myself. I proceed to sign his guestbook.

*I love you so much! <3*

I smiled as I pressed send. No matter how many times I told Damon I loved him, it didn't seem like it was enough.

I never planned on falling in love him. I never even planned on coming on this site. It all seemed like fate. Like we were meant to meet somehow. I have a feeling that if we hadn't met this way, it would've been another way.

Love is a wonderful feeling. It gives you a sense of warmth and security if it's reciprocated. It keeps you smiling throughout the day, and even if you had a bad day, in the end, you'll have a smile on your face because you're with the person you love.

It's also scary. Love is scary, not painful as some people say. Rejection hurts. Betrayal hurts. Break-up's hurt. And being in love puts all these ideas in your head. It scares you.

What if we break up?

What if he'll leave me?

What if he gets tired of me?

What if I'm not enough?

What if..what if..what if..

All these questions consumed my mind every single day. I tried to push them away, since we were doing so good right now. But it wasn't as easy as that. I knew he was going to leave for the academy, and I had a very strong feeling he wasn't going to string me along.

Why would he? We've only been together for almost 2 months. His sole focus is to get ready for the academy. I know he loves me, but it feels like I'm just dragging him down.

And now, he's working the graveyard shift, and we will hardly get to talk. Is that a sign or what?

I am honestly so fucking proud of Damon to have gotten that promotion. That means they see something in him. He deserves it. So, I'm going not going to be selfish about it.

---

Half hour later, Damon came online.

Damon17: Hey baby :*

Lil Star: Hey sleepy head. :* You awake?

Damon17: Yeah just woke up and showered. Getting dressed now. What you doing?  :*

Lil Star: Are you naked then? ;) I'm in bed.

Damon17: You perv, I have my boxers on. :p and move over.

Lil Star: If you get in bed with me, you'll never end up at work. ;)

Damon17: Aww damn. :( Maybe I can skip work.

Lil Star: I wish. :(

Damon17: Me too, so what have you been up to all day?

Lil Star: Well, I had classes, then I hung out with Missy and we had dinner. Have you talked to her?