I don't know how to say this in the best way possible but hell yes. I still love you and nothing has changed. I will still do crazy things and decisions for you, I will do it even if it means losing myself again in the process.
Is this what you want to hear from me?
Sadly, you won't. Thank You. Thank You for bringing out the best in me. I wouldn't be the woman that I am today if without all the pain, failures, and disappointments you've caused me. Thank You for breaking my heart again and again and again. You see? I made it this far. I have come so far and I wouldn't let you ruin the walls I've built around my heart. You don't deserve a fierce yet loving woman in front of you now. You don't deserve all the love that I have saved for the man who can and will be willing reciprocate it.
I have dreamed of you all night. I have dreamed of an amazing fairytale with you, until you destroy me - little by little, you destroyed my faith, my confidence and my belief in love and here I am, a woman full of herself. A woman who would still risk anything and everything for love, a woman who will kill steal and kill for love but this time it's different, because this time, she'll not do it for you. Never again with you.
Thank You for letting your guards down this time but my answer to your desperate proposal is a hell NO. A hell NO for a lifetime being your slave, being your pet, being your everything. You deserve an Anastasia Steele. Sorry, I'm tired of being her.
I love you. I still do. But you don't deserve the fire that I am today.
