Emotionless. (Cielois)

Chapter 9: Dancing in the Rain

At about 2, we pack up the soggy plastic bags that contained the sandwiches, and head back out on our horses. We ride the whole rest of the day, laughing and competing... We literally ride off into the sunset. After we put Licorice and Cookie Dough back in their stalls, we begin to head out, until...

"...did you feel that?" I ask, pausing.

"Oh, it's just sprinkling a bit. Nothing wrong with getting a little bit wet." Alois says, spinning around with his hands in the air.

I murmur complaints, but I suppose I can't complain... it's worth it to see Alois dancing around like a loon. He notices me giggling at him, and grabs my hand, pulling me in to dance with him. It takes a lot of convincing from him for me to move at all. Eventually we're both going crazy, spinning and singing to our hearts content...but as it rains harder, and begins to get colder, I pull him in, close to my chest.

"Oh, uh.... oops...." I start, realizing the intimacy of the situation.

I wait anxiously for Alois to burst out laughing, or push me away from him. But instead, he smiles the sweetest, softest smile I've ever laid my eyes on. He gives in to my grasp, taking his hand in mine and slipping his other hand around my waist, swaying in time to the trees in the wind. It's in this moment that I lose track of time; moments fade into minutes, hours fade into seconds... I can't tell which it is. All I know is him and I, and the light pitter-patter of the rain, falling on the fading brown leaves scattered on the moonlit ground. I melt at his gaze...I melt at his gaze.........how is it that I'M melting at HIS gaze? This boy, the boy who just a month ago was my sole enemy, tormented me at school, spat in my face, diminished any chance of me having a friend when that was what I needed most after the fire? Who pushed me off a porch with a smirk on his face, landing me in the hospital so I could be behind on my work? Who let worry eat away at Sebastian that I wouldn't make it, that we would fall into poverty? Who then thinks he can come and make it all better by paying my bills and letting me into his spider infested mansion to have to spend every waking minute under him and his emotionless, zombie-like butler? Thinking he can just smooth things over by giving me sweets and breath taking experiences, become my best friend without even a simple apology? After everything I've been through, all because of this sadistic, blonde brat who's arms I'm willingly wrapped in, who's eyes I'm submitting to as if he's the purest, most angelic boy in the world... how is this fair? I don't know who to be more mad at; him, or myself for bein this naive. I want to scream for him to get off me, yank myself away from him and run, run and never look back. But I don't. I don't do anything. All I can do is sit there, my mind clouded with every emotion but love. I'm not in control of my body or expression at all. I wonder what it is, if it's something I would regret later. Whatever it is, he doesn't seem to mind. He remains his blissful, melancholy look the whole way through, until thunder booms in the distance, and I break eye contact as a golden rod of lightning flashes behind him.

"It's storming... I suppose we should head back home now." Alois says, breaking away from me.

It's in that moment that I realize it's pouring rain, and my clothes are soaked. I blink hard and shake my head, water flinging from my hair. I don't say a thing as we begin to walk toward the malicious place he called "home."

"Why did you give me the money?"

Another bolt of lightning crashes to the ground.