Benefits

Ch. 43: All I Know

All I Know- The Weeknd feat: Future

"The reasons I can't have you are so easy to fix."

TW: talks of rape

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1 week later

Fall has finally arrived. There was no cheerful sun to make any sudden appearance. Now it was gloomy, which only reflected my feelings and thoughts.

I had to get back on my medication. It was too much, my mind was too numb. Jake was still missing, and Terry wasn't helping. He came to the school one day. One fûcking day, and it ruined an entire week. To top it off, I had not told Alice a thing. She would help in these type of situations. I was so tempted, every passing second I sat with her at lunch, every day made me want to scream at her about Jake.

I had to stop myself. Another topic I tried to contain myself at the fact that Lauren flirting with Alice clearly. I would of thought of as girl talk, but now I see it in a new light I can't look at any other way.

I started to make excuses to why I couldn't eat with them at lunch because of those two reasons.

And as I started to avoid my fellow friends, I soon realized I had a lot more problems besides Jake. I forgot Conrad, or should I say JC.

I was walking across the hallway across campus. I'm usually never around the outskirts, but here I was; minding my own business when I see Conrad in a big sweatshirt different from his usual bright clothes. His hands deep in his pockets. I avoided eye contact all together, but I was too curious.

"Sorry." A tall guy bumped into me once again. I'm so good at doing that.

I keep my head down at the floor, really not in the mood to speak to anyone.

"Oh hey." The voice says.

I look up to see Derek, Dawson's friend. The one guy who always seemed to be the cool relaxed one of the bunch, but that could just be a facade to get into everyone's pants.

I don't say anything, but try to figure out away to move around him.

"You don't have to be scared of me Dawn." I was surprised he even knew my name. I look up at him, still a bit nervous. "You alright?" He takes in my stature and my nervousness.

"I've been better." I mutter.

I see his hand move towards me, but he stops, sensing my discomfort. "If you ever need anything, I'm chill. Unlike my pig of friends." Noting to Dawson and James.

"Why are you friends with them?" I blurt out, my eyes wide at my outburst, "Sorry."

"No, it's okay." He laughs with his hand tightening around his backpack, "Believe it or not, I don't really count them as friends. Friendships come and go in life with the circle of people you meet. This high school experience is one faze out of many in my life."

"Sounds intellectual in a way." I say, finally cracking a smile.

"Kind of is." He smiles back, "Remember, if you need anything, just holler." His feet back stepping away from me.

"Wait!" An idea sprouts in mg brain immediately.

His eyebrows raise at me to proceed.