Benefits

Ch. 58: Time Is Running Out

Time Is Running Out- Muse

"Our time is running out, And our time is running out, You can't push it underground. We can't stop it screaming out. I wanted freedom. But I'm restricted. I tried to give you up. But I'm addicted. Now that you know I'm trapped. Sense of elation. You'll never dream of breaking this fixation. You will squeeze the life out of me."

mini A/N: long quote, but relates so much to Dawn and Jake's dynamic with The Underground...

It's been a hell of a night. Most of it was filled with whispered promises that I wouldn't get hurt. That nothing would happen to me.

I knew they were lies. Too ease in my stress. Now I lay wide awake. I want Jake. I want him with all of my beings, but I'm afraid it cannot happen. Unless I'm hurt. Unless I'm tarnished beyond repair. I knew what I was getting myself into, and now all I feel is regret.

I turn to him. He watches me. Now soundly, his brows furrowed. His eyes dark with lack of sleep and anxiety. I knew couldn't leave him. I knew in this moment of time that I would never be able to be away from him.

Because I loved him.

And he loved me.

I knew he would protect me with his whole being; I only hoped he would let me in soon enough.

--

Jake P.O.V.

"Do you want me to come in with you?" I ask Dawn when we are in front of her house in the car. I knew I had to explain everything, but Leger was on to me. I had to do something. Weather it was initiating the plan of killing him, or distancing myself from Dawn again. But that would just kill me.

It's too early to do the plan though. I haven't talked to everyone in The Underground. If I make the wrong move. I'm done. So is Terry. At this point even Alice and Dawn. If anything happened to them, I wouldn't be able to live with myself.

"Jake?"

"Yeah?"

"I said I'm fine. You never replied." Dawn says confusingly.

"I'm sorry, I was lost in thought." I haven't really spoken to her about the arrival of JC. I was grateful that he didn't rat me out to Leger, but that didn't mean I would forget everything else he's done to me. I was almost compelled to set a hit on him too that night.

"Are you listening to me, Jake!" Dawn practically shouts in my ear.

"Sorry, love. I've got a lot on my mind."

"Will you care to elaborate?" She asks smartly. The lips on her are plump, but they curve down. Causing her to look sad. I know she wants to know everything that's going on 24/7, but I can't do that for her. It's hard enough to keep secrets from her, it'll be even harder to tell them. "When I figure out what to do about Leger I will let you know, as for now, I need you to stay out of everything. Got it?" She's reluctant, but she nods her head smoothly. She's distant, I can feel it. My hand reaches for her cheek, and she closes her eyes in affections. "I know I told you no more secrets. I know I did." She opens her eyes now, her eyes blown out of proportions. "I just need you to trust me." My thumb runs across her bitten bottom lip. "Do you?"

"Yes." She nods. She kisses the pad of my thumb. I can tell she's nervous. The slight tremble from her lips, and her shaken hands that she doesn't think I can't see, but I can see all especially when my glasses are on. It's easier to catch things when your eyes are covered.

I kiss her softly this time; softer than I ever have. It's slow, and reassuring for both of us that we won't leave each other, or I at least I won't. I pull back now; knowing what's next. Knowing that even though my whole car is tinted, doesn't mean they didn't see Dawn come in my car. I've been followed or at least they have a tracker on me, that's the only way they could figure out where I was staying at last night. "I need you to cry when you walk outside." I say when I pull back slightly away from her.