Stage 4 Fear Of Dying ✔ (Frerard)

//Chapter 3\\

"Though I've travelled far,
I've been back to the start."

Frank's POV:

Gerard had driven me home later that day and left me with his number and a bone crushing hug. I quickly added him to my contacts as 'Gayrard' because I'm original and collapsed on my couch. I kicked off my shoes and turned on the TV just as F.R.I.E.N.D.S came on. Hey, I still have a sense of humour, and this shit is funny as fuck.

Suddenly a black shape jumped at me and I flinched in surprise. As soon as found it was my cat, however, I quickly relaxed and scratched behind his jet black ear as he purred loudly.

"Hey Fun Ghoul. How you doin' buddy??"

He yawned in response and curled up in my lap, his jet black pelt blending in with my jeans. I relaxed into the couch as I petted him. Something about petting a cat was soothing. I'm not entirely sure what but I wasn't gonna dwell on it, just enjoy my time with him. Hell, I'm almost positive he knew what situation I was in. The day I found out I was dying I came home and he practically flew into my arms and nuzzled my face, littering it with little kitty kisses as he let out small mews that sounded like sympathetic whimpers of apologies. I fucking love this cat.

I was hardly paying attention to the TV or the time before I yawned loudly and checked my phone. My eyes widened as I realised it was almost midnight and I had a message from 'Gayrard'.

Gayrard: Hey Frank, I hope this is actually your number. Cos if not, I'm scaring some poor, random soul. Anyway, if this is you, I just wanted to wish you a goodnight and wanted to know if you'd like to come over to mine for dinner tomorrow??

I stared blankly at the message, happy that he bothered to message me at all but still unable to smile. I didn't reply at first. Instead I got up, carrying Fun Ghoul with me, turned off the TV and retreated to my bedroom.

I put Fun Ghoul on my bed as I went into the bathroom. I slipped out of my clothes and turned the shower on. I winced as the icy cold water hit my back, but it soon warmed up and I felt my muscles loosen in the heat. I looked down at myself as the water poured over me and took in what I saw.

A small, skinny body. Fragile and sunken in, ribs protruding and scars littering my legs and arms. My fingers twitching uncontrollably and my chest heaving for every breath.

My eyes stung and I had to cover my mouth quickly as I let out a sudden sob. I sat down with a thud and my body wracked terribly as I cried for what I had become. I forgot who I was before all of this. Forgot what I looked like. What I felt like. What it was to feel at all. Every day I sat and watched TV, feeling nothing. No happiness, sadness, anger or fear. Just emptiness. Just...numb.

After so long, I'd finished my episode and had crawled under my covers, Fun Ghoul lying against the back of my neck and purring, sending a comforting rumble down my spine.
I was tired of this. Tired of feeling nothing. I wanted to feel something again. I didn't care what it was as long as it was something. And I think I know just how to do that. I picked up my phone.

Reply to Gayrard:

Okay.