This Chapter is dedicated to kartierkayy, for her continious support. I almost deleted this book, but she encouraged me to save it and now it's turning out to be amazing . Thank You so much. ♡
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I shoulda jumped from the window.
Not on no suicidal type shit, but just so I couldn't come to this bitch. I was late so I figured class would be in session, but class must have started at 9:30 here.
Soon as I stepped in The stares and whispers surrounded me making my hands shake and turn into clenched balls by my sides. They ain't want me here. That was obvious, and it was just as obvious I aint wanna be here as I stuck my middle finger up at a nigga who walked past me with the dirty eye.
Dude was lucky—real lucky I was trying to be on my best behavior cause my hand was itching to slap some sense into anyone of the sadity people in this school. They already thought less of me, wasn't nothing to give them what they'd been looking for.
The Guidance office seemed nowhere in sight as I wondered aimlessly through the school. It was big, every hallway seemed like a dead end. On every-corner was a guide, but that shit was no help. Just a bunch of arrows leading to places I ain't have no clue of. Wasn't no use in asking nobody— they'd turn deaf ear.
With every step, I'd contemplated several times walking right back out the door saying fuck this shit, but I was doing this for my mama. I would at least try this piece of shit school out. Just cause she wanted me too. I don't know how long I'd last without spazzing the fuck out, but I'd try it.
Five minutes into NorthRidge high and I could spot all the differences from our school. They talked different, Niggas wore suits and shit like they was at a private school, girls had on dresses like they was going to pageants. Everybody had their eyes on me in my saggin distressed jeans an black hoodie like I'd broken a rule or somethin by not coming to school in my Sunday's best
I couldn't give a fuck how they looked at me I wasn't wearing no shit like that. I was simple, not in to fancy shit —wasn't no school gone change that. You can take a nigga out the $outhside, but you couldn't take the $outhside outta a nigga.
Clearly, you could take the morals from a nigga tho. Three of em towered over someone in the corner giving them the business about they appearance, I ain't even crane my neck to see who it was.
Wasn't none of my business, and I wasn't about to make it mine. After all, shit felt like payback from all the shit people from my ends had been put through by them. Rejection was one of em, I ain't even feel bad just went on my my business just as everyone else.
