Flowers & Benches

23 and Bluebells

I sigh as Li and I enter the guys' house for their annual "We-Don't-Have-To-Start-School" party. As soon as we enter the busy house Li pulls me to Tommy. Coincidentally, Carter is standing with him.

"Tommy!" Li cheered I grin, Tommy trips over himself to hug his girlfriend.

"uhey, li-lii! hehehe li-li! that's silly!! li-li! tehehehe!" He greets, Lianna giggles at his drunken state, Carter just smirks.

"Tommy, dude, you're so wasted!!" Carter points out smirking, he looks at me the mischevious glint, I knew and had loved, in his eyes. 

I quickly look away. "I'm gonna grab a beer." I call out to Li over the loudness. She sends me a thumbs up, before turning back to Tommy who was talking to the lamp.

I make my way to the backyard, grabbing a beer on my way. I sit on the bench humming softly. I'd signed with a management company earlier in the week and we were working on my first album already. 

"Stars shine / and I'm all alone / Music blares in the distance / and I'm all alone / But as I look / a thought comes to me / So I stand and say / Can you see me now? / Can you hear me now? / Are you watching? / Are you watching? / I'm am rising now / off the ground / that you placed me on / like a pedestal / Can you see me? / We shined / but we crshed and burned / You left me in the ashes / to clean up all our messes / But as you leave / a spark enters me / I stand and scream / Can you see me now? / Can you hear me now? / Are you watching? / Are you watching? / I'm am rising now / off the ground / that you placed me on / like a pedestal / Can you see me? / You see / I am stronger now / Than I've ever been with your assistance / I'm doing this on my own / And all it took / was for me to see / My strength without you / Can you see me now? / Can you hear me now? / Are you watching? / Are you watching? / I'm am rising now / off the ground / that you placed me on / like a pedestal / Can you see me? / Can you see me now!!!! / I am burning up the skies / It's like there's no disguise anymooooooooore /  Can you see me now? / Can you hear me now? / Are you watching? / Are you watching? / I'm am rising now / off the ground / that you placed me on / like a pedestal /  Can you see me now? / Can you hear me now? / Are you watching? / Are you watching? / I'm am rising now / off the ground / that you placed me on / like a pedestal /  Can you see me now? / Can you hear me now? / Are you watching? / Are you watching? / I'm am rising now / off the ground / that you placed me on / like a pedestal / Can you see me now? / Can you hear me now? / Are you watching? / Are you watching? / I'm am rising now / off the ground / that you placed me on / like a pedestal / Can you see me now / Can you see me now / Can you see me now / Can you see me now / oh pedestal / Can you see me now up on that pedestal / ooh woah oh oh!!!" I sing trying to come up with good lyrics for the melody that's been stuck in my head for weeks. 

"Woah... that was gorgeous Cat..." I hear a voice compliment, I blush as Carter sits next to me, handing me a bluebell.

"Uh.... thanks Carr..." I whisper, he grins. "May I ask why you are out here?"

"You may," Carr grants bowing his head a tad, I wait for a moment. His response never coming. I smack his arm. "Owww!!!" He cried out holding his arm and staring at me, hurt. I give a knowing look. "Oh. Right. Well, I was going to grab a beer when I decided to look at the stars. As I went to open the door I saw you. So I came out to talk to you, then I began-"

To this day I don't know why I did it. It was an impulse and I think it was because he seemed like the old Carr. Whatever the reason is: I kiss him. He freezes for a moment, then seems to comprehend the moment, and he kisses me back. 

It feels like coming home. It has been almost 8 years since I last kissed him, possibly 9. I miss it, which sounds creepy, but I do.

He bites my bottom lip and I grant him entrance. His tongue explores my mouth. I run my fingers through his blond hair, he moans. I can't help but feel triumph at the sound. The kiss is fervent and hungry, like we're making up for lost time.