I'm Sorry (shoey Fanfic)

Different

Shane POV

It was almost midnight. I finally got the urge to pick myself up and head to bed. But I first went to the kitchen. I grabbed a bag of marshmallows and a Hershey bar. I then headed upstairs to my bedroom.
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*later in middle of the night

I was woken up by a loud crash down stairs. I checked my phone, it was almost 2 in the morning. I heard glass collide down stairs. I grabbed my wooden bat that I kept along the side of my bed. Someone was in the house.

I quietly tip toed down the stairs. The kitchen light was on. I slowly leaned against the wall and peek in the kitchen to see who was inside my house.

Shane: Ryland?

I was surprised to see Ryland on his knees cleaning shards of glass off the floor. With a bottle of vodka on the counter

Ryland:...oh Shane. I didn't mean to-

Shane: What are you doing here in the middle of the night? And drinking?

Ryland: Ignore that. I still live here don't I?

I forgot. I wanted to forget everything at this point.

Shane: Um. Yeah. But I don't want you in the same bed as me. So there's a couch right in the living room.

I turned around to head back up stairs.

Ryland: Oh, uh. Shane?

I look back.

Shane: Yeah?

Ryland: I'm sorry...about... Can we talk?

I really didn't want to. I wanted it to be over. Not to be brought up ever again.

Shane: Yeah, sure whatever. Maybe tomorrow-

Ryland: No. Were gonna talk now.

I was surprised to hear this type of tone from Ryland.

I rolled my eyes and shrugged my shoulders.

Shane: Yeah, okay.

We walked to the dinning table. I sat down on one side of the table. Ryland joined me by sitting next to me. Real close to where I was uncomfortable. I wanted to be alone. I didn't want him touching me. I was never liked that before. I always felt a spark when our arms rubbed against each other. This time, the feeling was just dull.

Ryland: Shane...

Ryland began to tear up. Playing around with his fingers.

Ryland: I'm sorry. That guy. That scene you had to see was a mistake.

He looked at me, waiting for a response. He looked back down at his hands.

Ryland: I don't know why I did it. It wasn't planned. I never meant to hurt you.

I started to cry. He did hurt me, like hell. I thought we were in love. I don't know what this is anymore.

Shane: How? Why bring him here? Why did you try to hook up with him?

Ryland: No babe, it wasn't like that.

He grabbed my hand.

Ryland: I got home early from work. I hadn't ate a good meal all day so I ordered post mates. When the guy arrived he complemented me. I was flattered. He made a move on me. I let it happened. I don't know why. It was in the heat of the moment.

I moved my hand because after that story. I couldn't touch him.

Ryland looked into my eyes.

Ryland: But I let it happened because, well we haven't, you know.

I looked at the ceiling then back at him. I shook my head.

Shane: REALLY? You let a lousy post mate hook up happened because we haven't had sex in a week?

Ryland: I'm not blaming you, but we haven't seen each other as much.

Shane: Yeah, because of work And you traveling for Clevver meetings!

Ryland: Yeah I know. I realize that now.

He stood up and looked at me with his beautiful green eyes. Showing me his sad puppy dog eyes. My biggest weakness. Holding my hand.

Ryland: It didnt mean anything. I love you Shane and only you. Your my boyfriend. I know we can make it  through. Let's make this relationship last and make it better. I don't want a fairytale ending. I just wanna be there to help you. Give you unconditional love.  I know you probably annoyed by me already, I'm sick of myself too. I know I Can't undo what I've done. I may never forgive myself, and you may never forget. But I'm a idiot to let  you, Shane, a wonderful person out of my sight.  I'm sorry I made you cry and broke your heart. Babe, I'm sorry. Please. Forgive me. Forgive this fool. Can we just go back to normal?

Tears started running down my cheeks.

Shane: I don't know about going back to "normal". You coming back, is gonna be hard for me. You made a huge mistake. I can't look at you the same anymore. I loved you before. I can learn again.

I got up and Ryland hugged me. He leaned in for a kiss. I acted like I didn't see him and turned around.

I saw in the corner of my eye that he frowned. Is it bad that I didn't care? He did worse to me.

Ryland: Thank you Shane. Ready to head to bed?

Shane: Mhm.

Ryland: Do you mind if I sleep with you?

I hesitated.

Shane: Sure.

I wasn't fine with it, but I was tired of arguing.

We walked into the bedroom.

Ryland looked at my bed side table. Where my bag of marshmallows and candy wrapper was from earlier. Then he looked back at me.

Shane: What?

Ryland: You started to emotionally eat.

Shane: Yeah so? You started to drink. You almost became a alcoholic.

Ryland: I'm sorry.

Shane: Okay.

I didn't know what to say. He had used that word "sorry" so many times, it started to lose its meaning.

Me and Ryland got into bed and under the sheets. He got closer to me and wrapped his legs and arms around me. Like he always did when we went to bed.

I grabbed his arm and pushed it towards him.

Shane: Can you maybe not? Just for a couple nights?

He pulled away from me.

Ryland: Right. Yeah of course.

I rolled over to the edge on my side of the bed. I turned on my side, facing my back towards Ryland.

Ryland POV

I turned to my side. I started to cry.

My boyfriend found me cheating. He trusted me more than life its self. I feel horrible that that I hurt my best friend.

He says he loves me. But I know he could never love or look me the same way ever again.

I've never done anything like this before. I feel humiliated.

I was bored and seeking for attention, I completely took my relationship for granted.

I don't see the spark anymore.

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