11/10 poetry

save

save

through shattered windows I cry out,
"oh, god, I'm going mad,
crack the door or break the glass."
give me an out now.
I'd kill just to leave,
I'd murder just to breathe.

I'm dying, don't you see?
this world in front of me
is reckless, clawing at me desperately.
I'm on my knees
and begging to bleed.
to feel something instead of this.

you think it's a game?
to be this locked away,
trying to love but losing weight.
I can't walk this way
and my legs begin to shake.
I don't feel that safe
but I'm too coward just to try
to fix anything.

I haven't eaten for three days,
I hardly drink, I'm always late.
yet you sill ignore my prayers,
all this fear begins to layer.
I'm sick of this and
if you won't help me,
I won't trust.
if I'm so worthless,
what is us?
we're all human but I feel
so left out and so appealed.

this is me.
I'll shout my name into the sky,
though I just want to get high.
this is me.
tired of your hurting and your doubt,
of your jokes and of your crowds.

"you're giving it up again.
and again, and again, and again."