11/10 poetry

xx k.j.c

xx k.j.c

in his fingers,
he twirls a lighter.
in mine is a match;
one I will not give.
he is icy with unknown desire
to end us both,
but on his tongue
there are only sweet,
smooth words
in a language I can barely comprehend.

"you think too much
and that means it's time to go.
it's been a blast but now
you're all alone.
and without me,
where would you be?
giving up or smoking weed?"

I'm so sorry I let you down,
won't do it again.
so sorry I gave you up,
but gave her my all.
please take me away from here,
but don't leave.

he is my light and I'm the dark.
he is my rose and four ace cards.
he is my lullaby at night.
lull me to sleep, he is uptight.
he is my escape and my sight.
yes, he's my dangerous advice.
he is my gun and my knife.
I won't give up without a fight.

he is my everything,
that's just how it's always been.
my trust for him outshines
any star you can find.
and I may not be bright,
but I know him.

he's a riot
in my head,
warring thoughts to pieces.
and I embrace the chaos,
for it's all I have.

he gives me pills I don't recognize.
I can't help it so I try.
and as I watch him burn it all,
what can I do except to cry?

I say,
"do it.
take the world before my eyes.
if you promise you'll be by my side,
that'd just be the price."

I can feel the fire take my life.
I can barely see, I think I'm blind.
and as I know I don't have time;
I call to him
once.

he's gone.