Shyland OneShots

The Irrepressibles- Two men in Love

This chapter is dedicated to @potterheadO9 for her song idea. This song is an amazing song that encapsulates Shyland almost perfectly and I fell in love from first listen. She has a Shyland fanfiction called 'Better With You' which is utterly amazing. She claims that it is "Just a (kinda) happy Shyland" but her story is actually slowly killing all the readers from unintentional angst. Its amazing! You guys should read it (If you don't already).

*Ryland Pov*

"If I asked you now,

Will you be my prince,

Will you lay down your armour

And be with me forever...

When you open me"

I walked in the house after getting home from work and know immediately something was wrong. All the lights were off and Uno didn't appear to be fed yet, which meant he hadn't gotten out of bed this morning after I left. I walk up the metal stairs to our room and see him still in bed staring at the wall. I walk over and sit down next to him, he barely acknowledges me. I look down at him and think back to the first time this had happened. We had only just started dating but I had stayed the night anyways and woken in the morning to find Shane in his 'zone' which was what I called it when he zoned out like this. I knew it was leftover from his childhood and his bouts with depression and eating disorders. It didn't happen often, but it worried me non-the-less. I still couldn't find a pattern to when it happened, it wasn't alcohol or any of the usual suspects when it came to things like this. "Shane?" I say hesitantly reaching out and placing my hand on his arm. He shakes me off and rolls over looking at the other wall. I laid down blocking his vision and just stayed there for a while staring into his eyes.

"All the power in me moves,

How you want to see

All the depths of me real,

When you open me,

All the power in me moves,

I feel real..."

Slowly Shane's eyes start to focus on mine and I can see into the depths of his eyes properly, I sigh knowing he was farther gone then usual. I could usually tell how easy it was going to be to snap him out of it by how much eye contact he made. I always tried to talk to him about them afterwards, but he claimed he couldn't remember anything. I knew he wasn't telling me the truth, it was just armour to keep himself from getting hurt. He always had terrible nightmare in the days following an episode, and I tried to help him the best I could. I had chipped off a lot of that armour, but there was more to go. I try to wake him, but I start slower this time, laying my hand on his chest and feeling his heartbeat. Buh-bum, buh-bum, buh-bum, buh-bum. As usual, non-elevated pulse. "Shane?" I whisper to avoid startling him. "Shane. Tell me what you see?" I say trying a new tactic I had devised for finding out what he was seeing. I hear him struggling to speak and his pulse goes faster. "Shane calm down, breath. Tell me what you are seeing" I say calmly using my free hand to stroke his face. He leans into my hand "I see you, getting hurt. Leaving me. You are being tortured you are hurting!" he says loudly and his pulse gets faster. "Shhh, Shane it okay. It's not real, focus on my voice. Can you see me?" I ask stroking his hair and looking down at him. We were both so messed up and we took care of each other. I continued stroking his hair and he doesn't reply. "I love you Shane" I whisper.

"I love you, I love you...

When I look into your eyes,

There's a danger inside,

When I see the edge

I can never hide,

See me running, running, running, running, running

Running, running, running, running, running

Running, running, running, running, running

To you, from you, to you..."

Shane starts thrashing about and I struggle to look into his eyes. I almost cry at the amount of fear I saw in them. I now understand why he was always clutching to me after an episode, he was seeing me running away from him, leaving him. "Shane! Listen to me! I will never leave you. I love you!" I say as I crush my lips to his as a last-ditch-effort. As soon as he starts to cry I know he has snapped out of it and woken up. He kisses me back fiercely putting his arms around me and holding on tight. I run my fingers through his hair and feel my own tears stream down my cheeks. I finally understood, I had found the connection between his episodes. Me. Whenever I made a comment about dating other people. Last night at dinner I had made a comment jokingly about how if one of us ever got annoying we could just date someone else for a while. I thought back to all the other episodes and how they correlated to other comments I had made jokingly about us dating other people. We broke apart and Shane held on hard not letting go of me and I didn't make him. I held on just as tight remembering all the comments that had triggered episodes and crying because I had been the source if these all along.

"There's a strange love inside,

It's getting louder, and louder, and louder, and louder, and louder

There's a danger I can't hide,

Who I am, it's who I am, it's who I am, it's who I am...

I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love...

Gonna build you up, gonna help you believe sunny!

Gonna build you up, gonna help you believe sunny!

There's a strange love inside,

It's getting louder, and louder, and louder, and louder, and louder

There's a danger I can't hide,

It's who I am, it's who I am, it's who I am, it's who I am...

I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love..."

"I'm sorry" I say finally. I didn't know how long we had hugging each other and occasionally kissing, but the sun had gone down. "I'm sorry if I ever said anything that ever made you think I might leave you. I love you. Those words are yours now, I am never going to say them to anybody else. Those words from me to you are yours now." I say into his ear as I detangle my arms from his. I sat up and properly hugged him. "I love you and I want to marry you someday and raise kids alongside you. I want to be by your side forever Shane. Because I love you." I say looking into his eyes. "You have become a part of me. And I can't live without you." I finish as his eyes tear up again. He pulls me into a hug again as an answer and I smile. "I love you."